Happy New Year, Walt
by lovemesomelongmire
Summary: A little re-do of Happy New Year, Vic, from Walt's perspective. What REALLY happened on that long drive home? Longer, will be multiple chapters and will get an M rating later, so if you like it, follow or fave me so you'll be notified when I add to it. Hope you enjoy it and feel free to let me know. So far, the water's fine. Got both feet in:)
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: So, my sister read my first story, loved it, but said she kept waiting for Vic to wake up from a dream, which made me start thinking. She also pointed out that a trip from even the fictional Durant to Whitefish Montana would be around 19 hours both ways, so that didn't make sense and she was right.:) She called me on my lack of research and I've made up for it in this latest endeavour of mine. What if Vic had been only dreaming? Events take place after Season 3 and are from Walt's point of view this time around, but with no other real time line established. It's really just my take on what I'd like to see happen, how I'd like to see it happen and purely all my own imagination and blatant ignoring of facts that might contradict my flight of fancy:).**** Hope you enjoy this story. I've broken it down in to chapters and there will be an M rating coming along, but for now…..read on and let me know what you think. I like it, but it's YOUR reviews that keep me coming back to this site to share**** Thanks so much, all of you, for reviewing, favouring and following me and encouraging me to carry on! If you find my writing style too convoluted, let me know; I can take a LITTLE criticism****…. And now 'unto the breach' we go…and ya, there might just be more fireworks**** xox**

**CHAPTER ONE…**

Here I am, New Year's Eve, driving down an unsurprisingly empty stretch of highway, heading for home. It's late, past eleven, and will more than likely be near midnight by the time I reach my destination. It's at least a nine hour round- trip from Durant WY to Bozeman, MT, but it was worth the drive to hand over the little punk I'd arrested yesterday after his cross-border car-jacking spree had landed him in my county. I'd just wanted to hand Bozeman back their garbage as Vic had said and I smiled, recalling that comment. I believe her exact words had been 'Why do_ we_ have to give Bozeman back their fuckin' garbage? Can't_ they_ come get it themselves?"

I gave a quiet chuckle and looked down. There she was, asleep beside me, her head on my shoulder, her blonde hair tickling my chin. I know she'd be mortified if she woke up right now, so I just pray she doesn't. I like her beside me like this. I like my arm around her shoulders, her warm breath on my chest. I like the clean, fresh scent of her shampoo and the feel of her right hand resting against me, just above my belt and the way her left hand is tucked under her chin. She fell asleep a couple of hours ago, leaning up against the passenger door, but somehow, she ended up here…and I'm sure not complaining about it! I'd heard her mutter something about 'doofus' and Whitefish Montana' and then there was the little 'eeww' she gave out and I wondered what she was dreaming about….

Vic. I couldn't help but give her a little squeeze and she responded by snuggling in closer. I smiled down at the top of her head and then turned my attention back to the highway. Outside the windshield, the full moon hung high in the sky, washing the snow-covered ground in its surreal silver light. Stars shone like diamonds and I was reminded of how lucky I was to be heading in to this. I should've been tired, but I wasn't. Sleep and I were not the best of friends, anyway. When Martha had died, I couldn't sleep. When Henry had been arrested, I wouldn't sleep. When all of it had been resolved and Henry was exonerated and I'd made my peace with Martha's murder and had finally let her go, I should've slept…and I did, but now, sleep brought different dreams with it, dreams that left me tossing and turning and wondering just what the hell I was doing. Sleep brought me dreams of Vic, dreams that left me aroused, confused, sometimes ashamed and in this moment, under this night sky, I couldn't help but wonder if she ever dreamt about me and felt those same things.

"You crazy old man" I told myself, but the self-scolding was only half-hearted. Vic and I were close in ways I'd never thought possible. The only other woman I'd ever been this close with had been Martha and that's why I'd married her, but I never expected to feel that way about any other woman, especially not Vic! It wasn't that the two of them were so very different from each other; Martha had had her fair share of fire and hadn't been afraid to speak her mind or give me a piece of it when needed; but Vic…well, I'd never really known a woman as outspoken and feisty as she was. I'd arrested a few and been told to go fuck myself in the process, but that was all in the heat of the moment. When Vic told me to fuck myself, well….it was somehow endearing, or had certainly become so over the years we'd worked together. I smiled quietly again, surprised at the ways Vic had changed me without me even being aware of it until just lately.

I remembered the first time she'd dropped a load of 'f'-bombs; I believe it was the first day I met her in the job interview and I recaledl looking at her like 'are you done yet' and being mildly irritated, but not really offended by her language. I was actually curious and intrigued by the way she could use the word in so many different contexts, but after hiring her, I did try to get her to limit her use of profanity with pointed glares, but after blatantly ignoring me, I'd just given up. Maybe if she hadn't been so good at her job, I could've used her profanity as an excuse to fire her, but after seeing her and her mind in action, I'd been thoroughly impressed.

Then there was the way she had of drawing me out or getting in my face. Calling me on my bullshit and lightening me up all at the same time. I didn't intimidate Vic one little bit and that was something new for me. My size alone could be daunting and I know my demeanor didn't exactly welcome friendly feelings from most people, but Vic had never shown an ounce of caution around me, except in those moments when I'd been unable to completely hide the pain that certain circumstances had brought me….and in those moments, Vic had been quietly comforting and a little unsure of herself, but there for me, nonetheless. That side of her should have surprised me, but I think I welcomed her quiet support too much to be surprised…and I think I'd let her in without even being aware of it. On the other hand, Vic hadn't let me in easily. She'd guarded her secrets and sins until there'd been no other choice but to tell me about them. I wouldn't have chosen to make her tell me anything, but again, circumstances had other plans for both of us.

We were a pair, me and Vic. After Henry, she was my best friend, my equal, my welcomed companion. I didn't have to take her on this trip with me, but I'd wanted to. She wasn't obliged to say yes, but she had. Sure, she'd complained like hell all the way there and most of it back until she'd finally nodded off, but I'd seen the spark in her eyes. I was beginning to believe that her complaining was her way of expressing grudging happiness. Vic. "_My_ Vic"…and ya, I said it out loud and it sounded _so_ right, at least to my ears.

My Vic, curled up against me, so warm, so soft, so like a little girl…..and therein lay some of my shame, but damnit, I couldn't help feeling what I felt for her. Convention, maybe even morality would probably say I should fight the feelings, but my body and more importantly, my heart, told me otherwise. I was what, thirteen, fourteen years older than her, had a daughter six years younger than her, but tonight, I was so done with thinking about all that. Vic was a grown woman, her own woman and I was a man who'd given this situation a lot of thought; too much thought.

With her beside me like this, I didn't want to think of the possible wrongness of it all. I only wanted to think about how right it felt. It was New Year's Eve, a time for saying goodbye to what was and a time to welcome what lay ahead. A time to take dreams and make them reality. I'd purposely asked Vic to come with me because I wanted her with me. I wanted to be alone with her. I wanted to talk to her about this thing between us. Of course, on the drive up to Bozeman, talking on a personal level had been out of the question, with our prisoner cuffed to the metal grill that separated the cab of the Bullet from the back of the vehicle, but I was a patient man and knew that we'd have time for talking on the ride back. We'd stopped at a diner on the way home to grab a bite to eat and once back in the car I'd tried to start the conversation.

"So…do you have any plans for New Year's Vic?" I'd asked but that simple question had only seemed to ignite Vic's displeasure with the trip. She'd grumbled about the whole thing, but I'd been unable to keep from smiling, if only slightly. She'd let me have it, I chose to ignore her and she'd finally settled down. After a few moments of hearing nothing more from her, I'd glanced over and seen her asleep against the door…and so much for my idea of having a little chat about 'us'. I suppose her ending up against me sort of made up for it, though.

I slowed down to take the exit off the highway. It wouldn't be long now until we were home. Too bad we weren't both going to the same home, but maybe there was something almost as good. I headed for the Red Pony, knowing that Henry would be throwing a raucous New Year's Eve party and the least I could do was buy Vic a beer to get back in to her good graces. If I'd been alone, I probably would've gone straight to the cabin but this New Year's I didn't want to be on my own. Didn't really want to take Vic out, either; would've preferred to take her home with me. Would've driven all the way to Canada just to keep her beside me like this, but as pleasant as either thought was, I knew I had to at least allow her a choice in the matter. I couldn't imagine the hell she'd give me for kidnapping her! But I wanted to do just that…and would she REALLY mind it? I was beginning to have my doubts about her imagined objections.

When I stopped letting my head think about the situation between us and let my gut take over, I began to feel that maybe I wasn't so crazy to think that Vic had feelings for me; deeper feelings than just strong friendship and mutual respect. I'd been a cop for the bigger part of my life and going on instinct was a huge part of who I was. Who I AM! Reading people and situations quickly and making split-second decisions is second-nature to me and a great deal of it relied upon my gut telling me what to do and when to do it…and my gut was telling me that if I pulled over right now, woke Vic up and kissed her, she'd respond. She'd wrap those arms of hers around me, maybe straddle my lap, press those sweet looking lips of hers against mine, open her mouth so I could explore its depths with my tongue….and we'd be making out on this deserted stretch of highway, abandoning everything else in a frantic attempt to REALLY know each other….and boy, howdy, what I wouldn't give to know Vic THAT way!

…and that's when my head kicked in and asked my gut if taking that course of action was the best thing to do, because it would change everything. My body sure did like the idea. My breathing had quickened, my heart was beating faster and I was decidedly uncomfortable below the belt. Not counting that disasterous 'liason' with Lizzie, I hadn't been with a woman since well before Martha had died….and once upon a time, any thought of Martha had been enough to check my desire and set me right on the path to celibacy, but I'd made my peace with all that and I think it was just the simple fact that it was Vic who was arousing my desire and not just _any_ woman. I know in my heart that Martha would approve of this attraction; would've liked Vic and her outspoken, unbridled take on life. Vic hadn't set her sights on me, the way Lizzie had. Vic hadn't used her sexuality to back me in to a corner and wear me down. Vic had only ever been the best deputy I'd ever had and the best female friend I'd ever known.

It took a lot of looking in to those amazing gold-flecked brown eyes of hers to see even a hint of a deeper attraction, but I know I'd seen it, especially lately since her divorce from Sean…and God, I wanted to see what she really felt for me, blazing from her eyes. If she ever did let it show, I'd be a goner. I'd let the veil over my own eyes disappear and let her see just what she did to me. I know I'd been slipping of late, but I was pretty good at keeping my true thoughts to myself.

As a cop, it was just another talent that came with the job, although my nature seemed to make me perfect for a career in law-enforcement, rather than the other way around. I'd always been good at keeping my true feelings and thoughts to myself. I'd never been much of a talker or an extrovert and in the majority of circumstances, I'd never let much get to me. I was a simple man, living a simple life, simply doing my job to the best of my abilities…or at least it HAD been a simple life until Martha was taken from me. I'd withdrawn so far in to myself that even I'd been afraid I'd never make it back, but then Vic had entered my life….

"Show me, Vic" I whispered. "Show me so I can show_ you…" _but did I really have to wait for her or was I only too afraid to take the first step, make the first move? There wasn't much I was afraid of, but when it came to this, I did feel some fear. What if I hadn't read her right? What if I'd only seen my own feelings reflected in her eyes? But then again, what if I had seen something there and did nothing about it? Was I going to let fear of possibly making a fool of myself stop me from finding out that truth? I'd never let the fear of dying stop me from throwing myself in to dangerous situation where my job, friends or my daughter were concerned so was I really going to let the fear of making as ass of myself stop me from finally finding out just what it was that was between Vic and I?

As I pulled in to the parking lot of the Red Pony, I decided that I could probably live with being an ass and that if I was wrong about us Vic would more than likely kick me there, just to make the point that I'd been wrong. It was almost midnight, the whole world was on the delicate edge of a new year and I wanted a new life. I certainly wasn't getting any younger and sometimes the Universe decided to take away the luxury of waiting…

The parking lot was packed, but I managed to find a spot as far from the bar as I could get. Even at this distance, with the windows rolled up, I could hear and feel the music blaring from inside the Pony. I hesitated a moment, knowing I was going to have to move my arm to put the Bullet in park and when I did that, Vic would wake up. I could keep my arm around her, but eventually, she would open her eyes and become aware …or I could put the car in park and get it over with. "You're a MAN" Vic had told me when she'd been doped up on tranquilizers that time she'd gone 'hunting' with Omar and because I wanted to be HER man, I moved my arm from around her and shoved the gear shift in to Park. I turned off the ignition.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: I bet by now a few of you are beginning to realize I'm not from the States:). I got my state abbreviations wrong in the first chapter, as my 'editor', Miss Cheeky, pointed out to me, for which I am eternally grateful. If it weren't for Miss Cheeky, I wouldn't be here! She's been such a big help to me and it's so nice to talk to someone else that understands the crazy mind of another who writes stories for the love and the 'need' of it. Publishing my stories here on Fan Fiction has been one of the best experiences of my life and for all of you that LOVE Longmire and especially those of you that LOVE Walt and Vic I say a huge THANK YOU for taking me in to your lives, for welcoming me here and for allowing me to share my stories with you! #LONGLIVELONGMIRE!...and now, on with the story...:) Enjoy!**

**CHAPTER TWO**

Vic stirred, blinking her eyes a few times as she blearily looked around. I sat perfectly still, the arm that had been around her now resting its hand on the steering wheel, my gaze fixed innocently straight ahead as I looked out the windshield. I was doing my best impression of my usual stoic self, but inside, I was a mess.

"Where are we?" Vic mumbled sleepily as she rubbed her hands over her face; she hadn't noticed she was propped up against me, not yet, anyway.

"At the Pony" I informed her

"We're not in Whitefish anymore?" she asked groggily, rubbing her eyes. I couldn't help the soft chuckle that escaped me.

"We never were, Vic. We went to Bozeman. Didn't realize my company would put you in a coma" and she grunted and then gave a little gasp; yup, she'd noticed how close she was to me. She moved away quickly and the shock of finding herself against me seemed to have woken her right up. She looked out the passenger side window, then back at me, all signs of sleepiness gone from her face.

"What are we doin' at the Pony?" she demanded.

" Almost New Year's" I told her after a quick glance at my watch. "Thought you might want a beer to ring it in. I'm buyin'" and I smiled.

"You're just tryin' to make up for the trip" she smirked and oh, that smart-mouth of hers did crazy things to me. I saw her do a quick double-take, looking out her window again and then out front.

"Was there a fire? I thought we saw a fire on the way home."

"No fire. Don't think you saw much of anything. You were out cold".

"Oh…" was all she said, but she sounded disappointed. I wasn't sure what that meant.

"If you just wanna go home, I can – " but she cut me off.

"No!" she said emphatically and then softer," I mean, no, it's okay. A beer sounds great right about now and ya, you fuckin' owe me anyway" and she raised one eyebrow meaningfully at me. This was not Vic's 'happy' face.

"You okay?" I asked and she took a deep breath before answering.

"Yeah, fine….just had a weird dream is all" but she was avoiding looking at me for very long. Just quick little glances. Her behaviour was confusing me and I was having second thoughts about following through…but I'd had enough second thoughts already. It was now or probably never….She went to open her door.

"Whoa" and I couldn't help I it, I reached out and caught one of her hands with my own, meaning only to stop her. That made her look at me, like I knew it would.

"Before we go in there, there's something I want to talk about" and my heart rate kicked up a notch, but I ignored it. I was gonna do this! She looked down for the briefest of moments, at my hand holding hers. When she looked back up at me, there was that old spark of defiance in her eyes and maybe a little…trepidation? I wasn't sure about that last part, but when she spoke, I got it.

"Ok, Walt, I know I was a bitch most of the way up to wherever the hell it was we went, but, y'know…I didn't really mean most of it…some of it, but not ALL of it! It's just that, shit, you barely say a word and trying to keep up the whole fucking conversation by myself makes things just a little hard, y'know? No fuckin' wonder I fell asleep" she grumbled

She thought I was gonna give her hell and she was squirming but at the same time almost daring me to go ahead and call her out. I felt a smile tugging at my lips.

"Ya" I know", I agreed, "but Vic, now you're the one that's making things hard", because I really did feel she was being a little too tough on me. To my surprise, Vic's eyes grew wide and her jaw actually dropped. God, what was wrong with her? What was wrong with me? Vic's jibes at my lack of conversation never got to me before. Maybe the arousal south of my belt was playing havoc with my head. I thought about that for a moment….

"Oh, Jesus", she muttered, "I'm still fuckin' dreaming…" and I heard the click of comprehension in my head.

"Is that what you were dreaming about?" I asked, trying to make it sound casual. I squeezed her hand hopefully, wanting her to tell me that she had been dreaming about me because the guilty look on her face was telling me just that, but I should've known better; she snatched her hand out of my grasp and yeah, she was WIDE awake now! So much for thinking this might be easier than I'd thought….With Vic, _nothing_ was easy!

"Like I'd tell YOU what I dream about! I'm gonna plead the 'fifth' on that" she replied.

"Okay then", and I nodded slightly, "that's fair. You don't want to talk about it, but I think it's time I said some things to you".

"You? You wanna actually say something to me now? You're the asshole who won't even let me turn on the goddamned radio in this piece of shit truck 'slash' hearse you drive", (and she actually did the air-quotes) "not that there's a decent radio station to be found here in Butt-Fuck Nowhere anyway and you're also the same asshole that thinks grunts and huhs count as intelligent conversation and then you go and say that…that 'hard' thing….and now you wanna TALK? HERE?" and she swept her hand across the windshield, "in this fucking parking lot? Don't be so goddamned romantic, Walt" and oh, that last bit just screamed sarcasm and I knew she was trying to put me off which only confirmed my suspicions about the nature of her dreams. I found it all strangely delightful and definitely a turn-on; I hadn't seen Vic this fiery in a while. I did my best to keep from grinning. Pretty sure she'd kill me if I did.

"Fuck YOU, Walt" and she grabbed the door handle; wasn't quite expecting that so I grabbed her arm instinctively and she glared daggers at me. I glared back knowing I couldn't show any weakness. It was hard though…I just wanted to kiss her so badly in that moment.

"I couldn't say what I wanted to say with that tweeker sitting in the back" I told her.

"So you couldn't say anything?" she snapped back.

"I said plenty." And it was true.

"For you", she agreed, "but not for a normal human being."

"I was thinking."

"What else is fucking new?"

"I was thinking that I needed to talk to you about…us…" and Vic's reaction was instantaneous and unimagined, given her seemingly pissed off state. She softened, just a bit, squared her shoulders, let go of the door handle and turned to face me head-on, bringing one knee up on the seat to help hold her position. It looked to me like I'd finally found the magic word. I had to admit that 'us' certainly did feel like the most powerful word in the English language at the moment.

"This better not be one of those monosyllabic conversations you're so damn proud of, Walt" she warned me quietly.

"Not feelin' any pressure here" I replied sarcastically, and took her hand in mine. Amazingly enough she let me. Words, don't fail me now, I thought. I took a minute to gather my thoughts.

"Go on" she quietly encouraged me and the storm that had been Vic only moments ago seemed to have passed. I cleared my throat, removed my hat with the hand not holding hers, set it brim-up on the dashboard, needing that good luck now more than ever. Out of habit and a nervousness that I couldn't deny but was going to do my best to ignore anyway, I smoothed down my hair. Vic absently tucked a stray blonde strand of her own hair behind her ear, giving me all her attention, making no effort to take her hand from mine.

I ran my thumb up and down over the back of it, intrigued by the softness of her skin and wondering if I'd get the chance to find out just how soft the rest of it was. As I looked in to her eyes, preparing myself to tell her how I felt, my heart gave a lurch and I was so suddenly full of love for this woman. She was waiting, patiently, and I never thought I'd see the day when Vic waited, period, let alone patiently, but she was doing it right now, doing it for me.

"Vic, I, uh…" oh, smooth start there, Walt, I chided myself. Why the hell was I stammering? If I didn't get it together I really was going to make an ass of myself before I'd even said one word, no doubt about that. She smiled. She smiled and gave my hand a little squeeze and that made everything alright. I sat there staring at her, mesmerized by her natural beauty. I wasn't stalling, I really wasn't. I just wanted to look at her. The lights in the parking lot cast a warm glow over her features; the slight tilt of her big eyes, her sweet little nose, her incredible cheekbones…and her mouth….those perfect lips….

"Walt, beer's gettin' warm, car's gettin' cold…." She sighed, giving a little nod over her right shoulder to indicate that maybe we should get going inside. Had I been gazing at her that long? Probably; I was totally lost in this woman and all I wanted to do was stay lost, forever…but if I didn't do something, the storm might just come around again and I could feel it waiting in the wings.

"If you're cold" I told her, the words seeming to come from a secret part of myself, "I can keep you warm" and I reached out with my free hand, brought it to rest on the side of her beautiful face and leaned in just a little nearer to her. I watched her close her eyes, saw her turn her face in to the warmth of my hand, felt her soft, full lips against my palm and heard her give a contented sigh as she nuzzled me, her own hand coming up to press mine even harder against her face.

"Walt…." And my name was like a blissful exhalation from her lips. I felt her warm breath and realized that talking could wait, had to wait. There were better and more satisfying ways to show her how I felt about her. Action was always my first choice over speaking anyway. Yup, words could wait, but I couldn't, not while I was touching her like this. Not when she was responding to it in a way I'd only dared hope she would. Not when I wanted to touch her even more. All my big plans for conversing went flying out the window and what I really wanted to do was feel those soft, warm, full lips of hers on mine, instead of on my palm. I slid across the bench seat, while pulling her closer to me. We met somewhere in the middle and she opened her eyes and looked straight in to mine.

"Walt" she whispered," I know you're not good at this shit, but this isn't talking….this is _doing_…" Her hand left mine and came to rest on the side of my face. She searched my eyes with her own. "Is this what _you_ want?" and the tip of her tongue slid quickly over her upper lip, nervously, but enticingly as well.

"It's a start" I managed to get out. God, I could hardly breathe. "Do I really need to say it?"

"You never were too damn big on words", she breathed, "but I'm with you on this. I get your point" she grinned, "Just tell me I'm really not dreaming all this" and that last part sounded like a plea. Vic sounding vulnerable? Oh, sweet Lord….I felt on the verge of free-falling.

"Talkin's overrated" I whispered as I leaned closer to her. "I'll _show_ you you're not dreaming."

We let go of each other's hands and both of hers were on my face, just as mine were on hers. I felt her fingers slide through my hair and I cupped her face, both thumbs stroking her glorious cheekbones. I slid a thumb over her bottom lip and she closed her eyes again and tilted her face up to mine, taking my thumb between her lips and gently sucking it. I shuddered. I closed my own eyes. I brought my face down to hers. I was about to finally kiss the most enigmatic, head-strong, passionate, profane but adorable woman I'd ever known, and God help me, she was _showing me_ that she wanted it just as much as I did…


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:**

**Well, here it is, Chapter 3. Not sure if I'm real happy with it. Walt wants to go in a different direction and I can't seem to stop him! I've rewritten this a dozen times and I've just decided to publish it as is and move on:). I know that Chapter 4 will be easier to write:) Thanks for your patience and your kind well wishes. Feeling better now, finally...STAY WELL you all and #LongLiveLongmire...FOREVER! Hope you enjoy this questionable chapter...:)**

**CHAPTER 3**

Everything seemed to happen at once.

Just as I brushed my lips against Vic's, wanting to tease her a little, the music that had been only pounding before suddenly engulfed us and a crowd of people ran past either side of the Bullet, hooting and hollering. Someone slapped the driver's side window. It was that sound that startled Vic and I apart, but her hands were still in my hair; mine were still on either side of her face. I turned my head to look outside my window, which had a pretty good film of condensation on it. Okay, then.

"Hey, man!" I got a murky glimpse of a parka clad, bearded young man, grinning in at us; didn't recognize him in that moment. "Henry's gonna set off the fireworks! Get out here!" and just like that, he was gone, but Vic and I were far from being alone. Every patron from the Pony was making his or her way to the open field that lay in front of us, just across the road. Chaos and revelry swirled all around us and our intimate moment was not quite so intimate anymore. I groaned.

"Are you shitting me?" Vic exploded. I hung my head for a moment, tried to gather some semblance of composure and then turned my attention back to her. There was pleading in her eyes as well as frustration. I totally got the frustration part. I was just about to say something when there was a more discreet knock on the driver's side window. This time, it was Henry. I dropped my hands and Vic did likewise. I moved away from her, she went back to her own spot, and I rolled down the window.

"Henry…" I greeted him, propping my elbow on the open window ledge, trying to appear at ease.

"Walt," he returned, "I see you two have made it back from Montana none the worse for wear, I presume" and he was grinning just a little too knowingly for my liking.

"Yup," I replied after clearing my throat. "We just got here…" A finger made its way to my bottom lip while the rest of them worried at the stubble on my chin. The familiar rasping brought me a bit of calmness….but not near as much as this habit of mine usually did.

"That is what I assumed as I did not see you in the bar," and I couldn't quite keep from glowering at the smug look on Henry's face. I knew he wasn't missing the state of my hair or the fog on the windows. I ran my free hand through my hair although I doubted if that action made even the slightest of differences.

"It was a long trip," I informed him and Henry laughed softly.

"Well, you are here just in time for some of MY fireworks." He leaned down on the window ledge, forcing me to move my arm and raised a hand of acknowledgement to Vic.

"Hey, Henry..." she said, but she couldn't quite bring herself to look right at him.

"Vic…You look a little…flushed," he said innocently. "Are you not feeling well?" As an answer, Vic gave him the finger. Wish I had thought of that.

"As a matter of fact," she quipped, "I was _feeling_ just fine until you showed up!"

She was pretty damn good at covering awkward moments...or making them worse.

"Why do I have no doubt about that?" Henry smiled before blowing her a kiss. He didn't wait for an answer. "It is almost midnight; time to light the bonfire and set off the pyrotechnics. If you two can manage to pull yourselves away from the questionable comfort of this charming truck, I have some of my special hot chocolate and other culinary delights waiting. I am merely putting the offer out, but if there is something else you would rather be doing or somewhere else you would rather be doing it…" and he let the sentence trail off, suggestively. I grabbed my hat, jammed it on my head and glanced over at Vic. She was doing up her coat.

"That's what we're here for, Henry," she replied, smiling innocently at him. She gave my shoulder a smack and reached for the door handle. She got out. I admired her apparent fall back in to normalcy.

"You coming, Walt?" she asked and I saw the teasing in her eyes. I gave her a wink before opening my own door, causing Henry to back off. "Wish I were" I mouthed at her, letting her know I could play the game, too. She actually blushed and laughed out loud. We walked with Henry to the bonfire which was just starting to take off. Henry made his apologies, telling us it was time to set off the fireworks. Before he left, he graced Vic and I with a sampling of his 'special' hot chocolate and a decidedly blatant leer, done mostly with his eyebrows and the small smile that curved his mouth.

"Asshole" I whispered for his ears only. His light laugh told me he'd heard me and then he was gone. As I raised the extra-large styro-foam cup to my mouth, I could clearly smell the liquor he'd laced it with. Irish Cream…with a hint of whiskey and cinnamon. Fireball? Vic and I hung back from the rest of the crowd, beside each other, but not touching, nursing our drinks. The fireworks were impressive, I had to admit it and five minutes in to them, I felt Vic's small hand creep in to my big one. She laced her fingers through mine and I knew the warmth that was suddenly rekindled in me wasn't coming from what I was drinking. I felt gloriously light-headed and some of it might've been from the alcohol, but not all of it. I gave her hand a squeeze. The familiar strains of 'Auld Lang Syne' took over the loudspeakers and the crowd began singing out the timeless words. I glanced down beside me at Vic and she was looking up at me. I bent down close to her, put my mouth against her ear.

"Happy New Year, Vic," I told her as the crowd counted down the seconds to midnight. She put a hand on the side of my face, turned it so her lips were next to my ear.

"Happy New Year, Walt…" and she held me there, letting me feel her breath against my neck.

"Oh, to hell with it," I muttered as I dropped my cup to the ground not even conscious of the fact that I was littering. I scooped her up in to my arms. She gave a startled laugh, dropped her own cup and threw her arms around my neck. Her smile put the fireworks display to shame. I dipped my head to kiss her. She snatched my hat from my head.

"Happy New Year to us!" I said against her lips and she had time to get out an 'amen' before I captured her mouth with my own. I closed my eyes. When she opened her mouth beneath mine, I opened myself up to the sweetest joy I never thought I'd ever feel again. I was drowning in a sea of sensuality and I didn't give a damn about who did or didn't see us. I didn't give a damn about anything but this woman in my arms, this woman whose passion was a mirror image of my own.

"I lo-" I meant to say it, I really did. I truly did love her but the pure depth of that love and its ramifications had only just hit me when we'd finally kissed and it felt so raw, so powerful but so very fragile at the same time. If I let it out, if I made it real with words, I would never be unable to do it. What if she wasn't ready to hear it? I realized I might be pushing things and while I was more than ready in some ways, when it came to a declaration of that much importance, I couldn't do it, not then, not when there was even the smallest possibility that Vic wasn't ready to hear it. Man, let me face down a homicidal maniac any day; I really was crappy at the emotional stuff… I knew what she was ready for though; what we were both ready for. It was an obvious no-brainer and a pretty safe bet. Yup, I chickened out…and never even realized what an emotional can of worms that act would lead to.

"I want you, Vic…" and the words just tumbled from my mouth in to hers. She seemed to hesitate for a moment, or so I thought. Maybe she had wanted to hear something more, that something else, but I thought it was clear she was pretty okay with being 'wanted'. She took my words in, took my breath in, took me in and then pulled away just slightly to say the words that were almost as sweet and still caused my heart to explode in perfect timing with the grand finale of the fireworks.

"…and I want you, Walter Longmire, "so damn badly right now. She reached out, caressed the side of my face, desire so evident in her beautiful eyes. I felt tears well up in my own. This incredible woman WANTED ME! It was probably a good thing that we'd forgone the 'L' word because if the 'W' word was enough to bring tears to my eyes, what would the alternative bring? We were both so clearly emotionally and physically charged up already. I could see the moisture on her own lashes and I just had to kiss her again and I wanted so much more. Hearts and flowers were not foremost in my mind at the moment anyway; our mutual desire seemed to over-ride all else. It had already over-come my naturally cautious nature and I sure wasn't thinking with the head attached to my shoulders…

"Let's go home," I whispered against her lips and there was no question as to where home was. We both knew we were going to the cabin.

"Anywhere Walt, anywhere with you, just make it fast," she breathed and it was in her eyes that she meant it. It had always been in her actions, but I'd just never really seen it before. So much I hadn't seen before…..but tonight, so much had been revealed and there was still the one sight I'd never seen except in my dreams that awaited me. Oh, it was going to be lights and sirens all the way to the cabin!

I pressed my lips against Vic's again. She opened her mouth. I met her tongue with my own and my knees went weak. I held her tighter to me, wishing I could hold her like this and still have my hands free to explore her pleasingly curvaceous body. It was one thing to steal glances at her, imagine what she'd feel like under my hands, but to be this close to doing just that? THAT was a whole different ballgame!

How many times had she come in to my office on one pretext or another, sometimes to lean over my desk, sometimes to just lean against the open doorway, one hip cocked, arms crossed just under her breasts? How many of those same times had I had to ask her to close the door on her way out, once our business was concluded, just so I could adjust myself in private and try to breathe again?

From somewhere that seemed very far away, I was aware of the crowd cheering, but I thought it was only them showing their appreciation of the light show Henry had put on. With my eyes closed, I felt Vic push against me, reluctantly drawing her lips from mine. Ahh, shit, not again, I thought.

"Um, Walt…." And she pointed over my shoulder. I looked behind me and there was the crowd, their attention fixed on Vic and I, their cheers and applause not for the fireworks, but for the display we were making. It appeared that the citizens of Durant had spoken. Not that I cared much for popular opinion in the first place and it was certainly the LAST thing on my mind now, but I had to admit that it was nice to know they seemed to approve. I felt myself flushing a bit, amazed that I could feel any kind of discomfort, aside from the physical, but it didn't last long, which also surprised me. I guess I truly didn't give a damn this time around. All my long ago thinking and worrying about it was for nothing.

My eyes scanned the crowd for the two people whose opinion I did value. Henry and Cady were standing together up front; each with an arm around the other and when they saw me looking they used their free hands to give us the thumbs up.

"About time, you two!" Cady called out. I did blush a little deeper then; after all, it was my daughter watching me perform this extraordinary display of public affection with my barely-older-than-her deputy but her approval was evident and I didn't back down. Henry gave me the sign of a Cheyenne blessing and that certainly helped. It wasn't a thing he would ever do lightly and I was touched and honoured that he'd made it clear with that gesture just how 'right' he thought this thing between me and Vic was. He had tried to steer me here before, but back then I hadn't been ready for it, but I sure was now. I tilted my head slightly to let him know I welcomed the blessing. I saw Ruby, smiling radiantly at us, The Ferg looking a little embarrassed but happy nonetheless. I saw others I recognized instantly, some I didn't, but not one of them seemed to be anything but pleased for me and Vic. Well, just in case, I decided to be the Sheriff. I set Vic down; even though it was the last thing I wanted to do and took my hat from her. I took my time adjusting it on my head, before raising my face to the on-lookers.

"I could arrest you all for loitering and public intoxication," I called out in my loudest 'authoritative' voice. The crowd grew a little uneasy while I surveyed them all with my best 'I mean business' squint. I fell naturally in to my stance, adjusting my hips to put most of my weight on one leg, hands going to my hips as I pushed the sides of my coat behind them, making sure they all saw my cuffs and my gun. I was hoping they wouldn't notice anything else, but was counting on the distance between us, the bit of darkness I was standing in and that fact that I wore my jeans on the loose side to conceal what I could certainly feel. For a moment, the music was the only thing to be heard. Okay, I'd made my point.

"What the hell," I grinned suddenly, throwing my hands in the air, "It's New Year's Day, so I'll give you all a free pass this time."

There was a collective sigh of relief just before the laughter erupted. There were even a few cat-calls and whistles from the more daring, definitely inebriated rowdies that came with any public gathering. I threw an arm around Vic's shoulders and she slid a hand in to my back pocket; gave a little squeeze.

"Show's over, folks" she added and I turned my back on them all. Vic snuggled against my chest and I started walking back to the Bullet.

"You really don't care that the whole town just saw us, do you?" she said with a touch of wonder.

"New year, new man," I replied.

"I'm certainly impresse,d" she laughed.

"You should be," I told her with a chuckle. We'd almost reached the truck when I felt a hand on my shoulder from behind. Instinctively, my hand went to my gun as I turned.

"Hey-hey! Easy there, big guy!" It was Omar, standing there with his hands slightly raised, a huge grin on his face. I relaxed my grip on my gun, but didn't completely let it go. Being ready with Omar seemed like a good idea, especially given his preference for my 'feisty Italian' deputy.

"You two can't leave now," he informed us straight up. "Not after that show!" Somehow, he'd insinuated himself between Vic and I. He had an arm around each of us. How the hell had that happened? I pursed my lips, giving him my famous 'you're really trying my patience' look, but he just ignored it.

"It's about damn time, Walt," he clapped me on the back, "and you, Vickie…well, can't say you have the best taste, but what the hell? Guess you had to settle now that I'm off the market!"

Vic gave me the look, rolling her eyes, raising one eyebrow.

"Could be temporary," Omar continued, winking at Vic and I saw her hand curl up on to a fist. Time to step in.

"It's been a long day, Omar," I told him. "Still have to take Vic back to her truck and then, y'know, let her go home..."

"Ya, right, if that's what you say, Walt," and he snickered and winked. "Look, let me buy you two a drink and then you can take Miss Vickie here home." Before I could say anything more he was hollering out to the crowd.

"Hey! Who wants to celebrate with Durant's newest couple?"

Apparently, EVERYONE did!

"Drinks are on me!" and Omar slipped from in between us and headed for the bar. Vic stood there, watching him, glowering. Needless to say, he had a sea of followers in his wake. I watched him lead the pack towards the front door, not sure what to ever think about him; he was definitely one of a kind.

"Walt…" Vic started, "that guy….if he calls me 'Vickie' one more time - ! We're not going to stay, are we?"

I put my arm around her shoulders again and drew her close, but before I could say a word, we were swept up on the crowd and propelled towards the Pony and now the two of us were flanked by Cady and Henry.

"You're not leaving now, Dad," Cady told me as she linked arms with my free one.

"Perhaps we should just let them go" Henry interjected, giving me a meaningful look. "You two have had a rather long day and Vic still has to get home. Walt, you might just want to go back to the cabin and…relax?" and I knew what Henry was hinting at. He hadn't been my friend for over forty years without knowing more about me than even I felt comfortable with…I knew he was okay with me and Vic being together, just not okay with the state I was in.

"Changed your mind a bit there, Henry?" I inquired with a touch of sarcasm. "You were anxious enough for us to stay in the first place," and I was deliberately ignoring what he thought he knew about me, even if he was right.

"What do you think, Vic?" I asked her, trying to ease back on the intensity of my emotions, making sure Henry saw the effort I was making.

"Well..."and she shot a quick glance at Cady then her eyes were back on mine. I caught a hint of discomfort.

"You did say you'd buy me a beer, if I recall," but she smiled anyway, in spite of. I could see it in her eyes that she really didn't give a damn about the beer, but she did give a damn about what Cady thought and that impressed me. We weren't teenagers; we didn't have to let our hormones rule our lives or this moment…but damnit, I sure felt like I was eighteen again.

"Omar's buying so that saves your cheap ass," she teased me "and if we leave now, well, he might just damn well change his mind."

She gave Henry an 'I've got this' look.

"Think of it as being good for business" she told him and gave him an affectionate slap on the shoulder.

"I'll make sure Walt gets home to…relax. I have to pick up my truck at the cabin anyway."

"I have no doubt you will get him home," Henry informed her, "but – "

"Stop worrying, Henry," Cady piped up, her smile radiant.

"Vic's got my dad's back, the way she always has. We have to celebrate this moment! I mean, my God, MY dad kissed her in front of EVERYONE and we both know what a big deal that is!" She laughed.

"Besides, I want to get the low-down from Vic about all this!"

"Perhaps a celebratory drink is in order" Henry conceded. "It might just give you time to catch your breath, Walt" and the last was said mostly for my hearing.

"I'm fine," I told him firmly, "so why don't you two go set us up," I suggested. "I want a minute with Vic," and Cady grabbed Henry's arm, dragging him towards the bar.

"Don't be too long, Dad," she warned me, "and don't let him sneak off, Vic!"

"We'll get out of here as soon as we can," I told Vic when we were alone, my lips brushing her ear.

"Alright," she agreed grudgingly, "but if I jump your bones in the bar, it's on you, buddy! For your own safety, I think I'll refrain from drinking too much," and she gave a soft chuckle, slipping a hand in to my back pocket again where it seemed to fit just right.

I gave her a hug.

"Cady was right when she said you've always got my back," I told her lightly, but there was a great deal of truth in that statement.

"Just don't let me wait too long to have your front," she warned gently.

"One drink," I promised her, envisioning her having my front. I put my arms around her and hugged her tight.

"What am I going to say to Cady, Walt?"

"Probably won't have to say much; she'll grill you." I knew it was true.

"That's what I'm afraid of!" and she returned my hug. "We didn't really think this through, did we?"

"Not really," I agreed. "I thought I had on the drive, but…well, I just couldn't help kissing you, Vic…Didn't mean to do it in front of everyone, but I really didn't care at the time…"

"I'm not sorry you did." She lifted her head off my chest and tilted her face up to me. "I love the way you kiss."

She smiled. I bent my head and found her lips with mine. Her hands wound up around my neck and I drew her closer; it was never close enough.

"The sooner we go in," I told her, "the sooner we can leave…"

"You're right," she agreed. "With all these damn interruptions, I guess we were just meant to wait a little while anyway. You sure you're alright with all this?"

"I'm sure…" I told her, although a part of me hesitated. It wasn't that I didn't want her; it was more that I wanted her too much…and I was regretting not telling her that I loved her, but it had all happened too fast, too much felt out of my control. I'd lost any sense of control I might've had the moment I kissed her.

We held each other a moment longer and then reluctantly parted. I kept an arm around Vic's shoulders and she slipped one of hers around my waist and we entered the Pony. The patrons held their glasses high for us, cheering as we made our way to the bar, where Cady was sitting and Henry was tending. I sat down next to my daughter, Vic on my other side, my arm still around her.

"So, you're really okay with this, Punk?" I asked my daughter, feeling light-hearted. She squeezed my arm and gave me an adoring look.

"So very okay with it, Dad, really…You look happy; you and Vic both," and when I looked down at Vic, I saw it was true. She was smiling at Cady, looking a little calmer. I know I was feeling down-right delightful for the first time in a long time. It was all going to be okay. We needed this breather. I needed it to get my head back on straight, gain back some control.

My belief in my ability to do that turned out to be a very fragile thing...


	4. Chapter 4

**So, here it is, Chapter 4! Sorry for the delay; couldn't log in to FF site until now. Sure hope you all like it:) Had some amazing help from the wonderful Miss Cheeky on this one. Thanks so much, girl; you're the BEST! According to the reviews, you are all going to hate me, but hey, think of it as foreplay; at least it's lasting a while! LOL THIS ONE IS FOR ALL YOU VIC & WALT FANS...and may we see some of this on NETFLIX! #LONGLOVELONGMIRE!**

**CHAPTER 4**

"You're a lucky sonofabitch, Walt."…

"Hhmm?" I was pleasantly buzzed. I had to shake my head, come back to reality. I'd been staring at Vic up on stage doing the karaoke thing with Cady. Vic had taken off her coat not long after entering the bar and now, she'd taken off her uniform shirt to reveal the curve-hugging, body-shaping long sleeved t-shirt she'd been wearing underneath. A sheen of sweat from the lights and her movements glistened on her exposed skin. Oh, it felt good to be looking at her without having to hide the fact that I was and my slight grin was proof of that. Every now and then, she would shoot me a little smile and I'd melt.

All the initial attention we'd received had died down now. Folks were going about their own business and I, for one, was relieved. One kiss had led to us being a couple…

…and one beer had led to four… and now I was sitting here with Omar, drinking whiskey, not really listening to him, watching Vic. She was a better singer than poor sweet Cady, a damn good singer, actually but that was beside the point. She was having fun, with my daughter, and I was grateful for that. Of course, Cady was tipsy herself but still, it was nice to see them getting along so well. Imagine that! I know I never had.

"I said you're one lucky sonofabitch, Walt."

I tore my gaze away from Vic and looked at Omar. He was nursing his drink, his eyes on the stage. I had to blink a few times to focus on him. I was feeling just a bit tipsy and considered calling a quit to the drinks but Omar was filling my glass while I considered.

"Lucky?" I asked.

"You, Vic…" He looked at me, reluctantly it seemed, and I felt a slight twinge of jealousy watching him force his attention away from Vic.

"It was just a kiss," I told him, not wanting to go through all the hype again. Really, it had only been a kiss and yet we were now a couple and to be fair, I suppose I would have thought the same about any other two people, but Jesus, it was all getting to be a bit much, or maybe that was the whiskey doing the thinking for me. Just a kiss, but what a kiss… and what it did to me… I turned my attention back to Vic.

"Bullshit" Omar replied softly. "You two have been dancing around each other for years now. About time you did something about it."

"People kiss all the time, Omar."

"_They_ do._You_ don't, and you're a damn fool if you can actually sit there and tell me it was 'just a kiss'…."

"So, you know me that well, do you?" and I was getting a little irritated.

"I've seen it with my own eyes, Walt…the way you look at her, the way she looks at you and I've heard about it. That time Vic went after Mathias when he tried to slug you for going on the rez, and I was there when that granola sonofabitch Pete shot Vic with those tranquilizer darts. Man, I thought you were gonna kill both of us! You were pissed, Walt, and it wasn't just because she was your deputy. You were pissed because it was Vic."

"I should've locked up both your sorry asses for that," I told him angrily, avoiding a further discussion of just what had made me so angry that day.

Ya, I remembered it all too clearly, even with a head full of whiskey. I'd been furious and worried out of my mind. I'd let Vic go with Omar, thinking she'd be safe, but I'd been wrong. I'd gone to the hospital to see her, to make sure she was all right, to ask her if I should call Sean to let him know what had happened, even though I hadn't been looking forward to having to explain it all to him. What Omar didn't know about was what had transpired in Vic's hospital room. She'd been adamant even in her doped up state that I not call Sean, that he wouldn't care anyway… not the way I did. When I'd tried to defend him by saying we were different men, she told me I was different because I was a man… and that had said a lot to me even back then about the state of her marriage. Had the wheels in my head started turning even then?

I remembered looking down at her, so helpless and groggy, rubbing her eyes like a child and feeling bad that I'd put her in that position by letting her go off with Omar. It hadn't really been his fault, but I was still pissed at him about it. And now, I was a little pissed at myself for putting her in another position by kissing her in front of everyone. I really should've thought a little more about that impulsive move. Too late now, though.

We hadn't had much of a chance to talk about it. She had said she was okay with it, and she'd handled Cady and her questions like a pro and she definitely looked okay up there on the stage, but still….

I should've waited. I should've driven straight to the cabin instead of the bar. I should've asked her in, sat down and talked to her about… things. Kissed her in private, if that's the way things would've gone. Or not kissed her at all, but that was a ship that had sailed far away by now and I didn't regret kissing her and I didn't regret wanting her…

…but I was beginning to regret switching from beer to whiskey.

For a while there, I had become calmer, relaxed, able to curb my desire among the company of close friends and family. Cady had looked so pleased with the notion of Vic and I together and even Henry had calmed down a bit when it became obvious that Vic and I weren't going to jump each other in the bar. I thought we had restrained ourselves admirably. Well, Vic had. She had lightened the mood by engaging with Cady, telling her that things had just clicked between us on that long drive. She'd made it sound like a natural thing that we'd finally come to the conclusion that kissing was just a logical progression between us and she'd moved herself just a little bit away from me, to give us space that we'd both needed. We behaved ourselves.

She knew I was uncomfortable with all the attention I'd brought upon us despite what I'd said, and I think she was a little uncomfortable with it too, but not sorry about the kiss. I knew that for sure because when we did finally have a small moment to ourselves, we'd moved to a table in the corner and she'd pulled me to her and kissed me as though she'd been starving for the taste of my lips.

"This isn't over" she'd told me and then she'd gone to get us something to eat and I'd watched her go, watched the sway of her hips and knew that she was right; it was far from being over.

Watching her now, I was beginning to feel the fire grow inside me again. I'd banked it, but looking at her now… well, ya, things were starting to heat up.

She was dancing while she sang, her hips moving sensuously from side to side, her eyes closed, head slightly back, exposing her graceful neck and I wanted to go to her, go behind her, wrap my arms around her and press myself against her, feel her hips move like that against me, kiss the inviting curve of her neck…

"You can't even take your eyes off her now," Omar said smugly.

"Well, maybe _you_ better," I threatened him and he actually laughed.

"I know which one of us is the alpha in this situation, Walt, trust me! But boy, you better get your head out of your ass and figure out what this thing between you and Vic is. 'Just a kiss'.Yeah, right!"

"Don't you have somewhere to be, Omar?" I hinted. He was beginning to annoy the hell out of me.

"As a matter of fact, Anita just walked through the door. She's come to take me home," and he put meaningful emphasis on that last word, "Just like Vic's going to take _you_ home, so figure it out, Walt. Hopefully before you get there. You love that woman and if she loves you back, you're one lucky man."

He stood up as an attractive brunette walked towards our table. She was stunning, I'll admit it, definitely Omar's type; dressed to the nines, make-up done perfectly, hair long and flowing yet perfectly in place. She greeted him with a kiss and smiled graciously at me as Omar made the introductions. I stood, just a tad unsteadily and offered her my hand.

"Nice to meet you" I told her. Before we could pass more pleasantries between us, Omar was clapping me on the back.

"Happy New Year, Walt," he offered, and there was actually some sincerity to it. "Think about what I said and what you want, what she wants and just be happy for once, okay? Everyone deserves to be happy every now and then. Or better yet, just stop thinking, Walt!"

He slipped his fringed leather coat on and put his arm around the lovely Anita and before I could come up with a reply, they were heading to the door, Omar calling out his goodbyes to one and all. I sat back down, although it had more to do with gravity than with an actual will to do so on my part; I was definitely over my limit in the booze department.

Omar. What the hell was I supposed to think about the things he'd said, or not think? I grabbed the bottle and poured myself another shot. I was just bringing it to my lips when Henry slid in to Omar's vacant seat.

"So this is your choice of poison for the night," he mused.

"Not really. Omar left it behind. Seems a shame to let it go to waste" and I threw back the shot, feeling it trail that faint hint of fire down the back of my throat all the way to my belly.

"Why are you doing this, Walt?"

"Celebrating?" I asked, being deliberately obtuse. "You asked me to come in and celebrate so here I am. What's the problem, Henry?"

"Do not play the fool with me, Walt…"

"Then don't play the psycho with me, Henry. One minute you want me to come in, the next you want me to go, then you want me back in… I'm getting very mixed signals here." I poured another drink. I didn't really want another, but I didn't want to deal with Henry either. Not like this, anyway.

"I know what you are afraid of," he informed me, and our eyes locked. "I know about the fire inside you. I know you try to control it, but the very nature of fire is fickle at best. It has a habit of getting away from you, no matter how hard you try to contain it."

The honesty in his eyes shook me. The ways he knew me and the things he knew about me had always shaken me to some degree and I didn't like being shook up.

"It's called heartburn, Henry, but they've got pills for that now. Even I know that." I put my hand around the glass, and Henry put his hand on mine.

"Just stop it, Walt." There was enough authority in his voice that I felt compelled to obey him. In his dark eyes, I saw myself reflected the way he saw me and it wasn't a pretty sight.

"I don't know what I'm doing" I heard myself say softly. It was funny that Vic and Cady could be singing their hearts out, music and conversation all around us and yet it felt like Henry and I were the only two people in the room.

"I thought I did… but I don't. This," and I pointed to Vic up on stage with my free hand, "could change everything and all because I just couldn't help myself…" Yup, I'd definitely had way too much to drink, and I never would have admitted any of this to Henry without the whiskey. Well maybe I would have eventually, but not like this. Too late now, though.

"I know," Henry told me, his tone gentle. He kept his hand on mine, but he wasn't restraining me any longer. He was offering me his support.

"I want her, Henry. I want her like I've never wanted any other woman… and I have, for a very long time."

"Perhaps not even as you wanted Martha?" he suggested. I had to think about that for a moment. I looked down at the table and tried to find the answer for that.

'It's nothing like the way it was with Martha," I eventually told him. "It's so different, so intense, so… not me…"

"But it is you" he assured me. "It is that other part of you that Vic speaks to… and I have considered this a great deal since the two of you have been here. I was worried, I will admit that. I was worried about what you would do, how you would do it. She sets the fire inside you free and I have never seen you quite this way and while I am surprised I can only imagine how it must be for you."

"I don't know what to do with it, Henry. I've always tried so hard to keep it contained. You saw me in Denver, you know what I did, what I would've done if I'd been able to and that rage comes from the same place."

"That was a different kind of fire entirely back then. You were fighting for your wife, Walt…"

"Well, it kinda feels the same this time around. Like I'm still fighting… and what am I fighting for now? I only wanted to tell her that I love her. That's what I meant to do and then I kissed her and she kissed me and it all went bat-shit crazy from there…"

"Her charming vocabulary seems to have insinuated itself into yours," Henry laughed, and then he grew serious.

"Do you love her; truly love her? I am sure that you do. I have been sure for quite some time now, but what about you? I gave you the blessing because I know this is the way for you and Vic. This thing between you two cannot remain unspoken. You know that. Are you ready to acknowledge it? Perhaps that is where the 'fight' is coming from?"

"I always seem to hurt the people I love" and I looked him in the eye again, daring him to tell me that wasn't the truth.

"I know you believe that and in these past few years it would appear that that was the way of things, but before _you_ were hurt, that belief was never a part of you. You had many wonderful, happy, peaceful years with Martha and Cady. You laughed, you smiled, and you went through the days with light and love in your heart. What happened to Martha was not your fault and I know you are beginning to accept that to some degree… but what happened to her changed you, brought out the other side of you and you survived it, but that is all you did." He paused but I had nothing to say, so he continued.

"It was not until Vic showed up that you finally began to stir again. It is not what you had with Martha and it will never be the same thing. You have to accept that, Walt. You have to accept that she is a very different woman and speaks to a very different side of you, but she speaks to you nonetheless and that is what is important here. She woke you up to be the man you are now. All things die, even the selves that we once were… and all things are reborn, but not always the way they used to be. When Martha died, that part of you that you gave to her died as well. Those were sad days, my friend… I watched you slip away and there was nothing I could do for you. It took Vic coming in to your life to bring you back to us and I can honestly say that I love her for that, but can you?"

"It's just so different," I replied. My eyes went back to the stage. "Look at her," I told him. "I see her there and my heart feels like it's going to explode. I see her and I want to be there with her. I want to take her in my arms and hold her against me. I want to keep her that close to me forever." Oh man, I was putting it all out there, but couldn't seem to stop myself.

"I think of all the times she's been there for me, all the shit we've gone through, all the things we've both faced and how they've changed us but we still managed to make it all work, together. One minute it's my heart that's leading me when it comes to Vic, and the next thing I know, I kiss her and it's my body that's giving the orders… Is that love or has it just been that long since I've been with a woman?"

"It has not been that long, Walt. There was Lizzie…"

"That's not something I even want to talk about in the same breath as Vic. What happened with Lizzie was complicated yet so simple. She pursued me, she was relentless and it was all about sex and nothing else."

"Then that should help to answer your question" and Henry smiled just a little.

"Yeah, well. Easy to say… but I did feel bad about it after…"

"That is because you think too much, about everything. Some things just are" and he saw that look in my eye, that 'don't even go there' look, the same look I'd given him long ago when he'd told me 'it is what it is'. He refused to let me speak.

"There are things you cannot control, Walt. Accept that. Did you ask Lizzie to pursue you? Do you think it would have made a difference if you had been more forceful with her? The way I see it she wanted you, she planned it out, she got what she wanted, and that is the end of the story. She knew how to play you and before you get all in my face about that, consider this; did Vic EVER play you? Did she ever come on to you; did she ever try to manipulate you in any way?"

"Well, there was that time she called me up to Pronghorn Ridge about finding a dead body that turned out to be a dead sheep…" I smiled.

"And you deserved that." Henry smiled back. "But look at the chain of events that brought about. You got out, you went back to work, and you did the notification yourself. So she might have manipulated you, but it was only for your benefit. All you got from Lizzie was a quick lay… and that is all it should be to you; nothing more."

"Fine," I gave in. "You're right. Enough time's gone by now that I don't even think of Lizzie at all. I guess I could almost say it was what it was… but don't hold me to that or I swear I'll find some reason to throw you back in Tri-County Jail again where I hear it's 'go red or go dead.' We both know you're only a wannabe Indian anyway." It amazed me that we could laugh at that. Time does heal some wounds.

"For what it is worth, Walt, I am sorry that I let myself be intimidated by what I saw between you and Vic outside, the intensity of it. It is not for me to judge or decide what goes on between you or how it goes on. I know you are good for each other. I know you belong together. The thought of things changing between you unnerves you, but change they will; they have to. They already have. I know you will survive this uncertainty and move through it. I am sure Vic is feeling much the same and I am more than interested to see how you two stubborn people will go about making this work… because it will work, of that I am sure." Henry smiled, trying to reassure me.

"You make it all sound so simple, Henry…" I sighed.

"I will ask the Spirits to guide you in the acceptance of all that dwells inside of you, Walt, and I will tell you what you already know; you're not the only one with this fire inside," he looked at Vic with a smile, "She is just more willing than you are to let it out," and he laughed. I had to agree with him on that.

"Maybe that's what scares me" I mused aloud.

"If that is the case, then I would say you have every right to be frightened", and we both chuckled.

"Would you consider letting her work here on weekends?" Henry asked. "She has an impressive singing voice."

"Who knew?" I softly acknowledged Henry's statement. "But you'll have to ask her; no one speaks for Vic, except Vic!" We both laughed at the truth in that remark.

"You are a wise man, Walt." Henry clapped me on the shoulder, freeing my hand to allow me to finish my drink. Although the conversation had grown light-hearted, I still felt uneasy. I wasn't sure if Henry completely understood just how badly, how desperately I wanted Vic. When fire meets fire, there's really no safe place to be. Didn't know about anything else, but I was wise enough to know that!

"Before you leave, I would like to give you something to help you celebrate with Vic tonight," and with a final pat on my back, Henry rose and went back behind the bar. I should have been embarrassed by Henry's reference to what was going to happen between me and Vic, but I wasn't. Henry knew me better than I knew myself most times and there wasn't much we hadn't talked about or much we hadn't shared in that slightly mystical way that lay between us. We had more than our fair share of experiences between us, things that had bound us together more closely than if we had been actual blood siblings.

We'd seen and gone through some things together, both physically and spiritually, that had occasionally made the need for words seem ridiculous and to be embarrassed around him was never going to happen. Uncomfortable? Sure, sometimes, but that's only because he knew things that I could barely grasp at times, but most of those things were of the spirit world, a place that I had only the vaguest concept of, but a place that had on occasion brought me more solace than I could ever explain. I wished I could go there now, but somehow, I wasn't feeling too 'spiritual' at the moment.

I toyed with my empty glass, hearing all that Henry had told me and being thankful to have a friend that cared that much for me. 'Accept' seemed to be the gist of his advice to me, but could I? Should I? Half-cut I still had to over-think things….

"Oh my God, Dad, that was soo much fun!" Cady declared breathlessly, interrupting my thoughts; I hadn't even noticed her coming over to me. She threw herself in to the chair opposite me. Vic was right behind her, but instead of sitting down, she came to stand next to me, not giving me a chance to get to my feet. As naturally as breathing, she slid a hand along my shoulders and I slipped an arm around her waist; didn't bother to over-think THAT move!

"Did you know she could sing like that?" Cady gushed, indicating Vic.

"I didn't," I told her and then I looked up at Vic, "but it's nice to be so pleasantly surprised." To my further surprise, Vic leaned down and gave me a soft, gentle kiss while hitching one hip on to the arm of my chair; that's about when I stopped thinking, period!

"You two are just so damn cute together," Cady blurted out and we all ended up laughing. Me, cute? Now that was funny.

"'Cute' is when your dad does that sideways sort-of-smile of his and then tucks his head like he's all embarrassed," Vic threw out.

"That's good," Cady agreed, "but even better is when he does this." And she put her hand over her mouth and then ran her fingers over her lips and her chin, back and forth.

"That usually precedes this." Vic started pointing with one hand and then the other. They both thought it was hilarious while I thought they were both crazy; I did not do stuff like that. Just as they were about to go in to more charades, Henry arrived, with a picnic-type basket.

"I was hoping for the cavalry but I got the Indians instead," I greeted him.

"Then you should most definitely be thankful your hopes were dashed" he replied.

"OOO, what's in the basket?" Cady asked eagerly, reaching out to try to take a peek inside. Henry snatched it away from her.

"It is… an apology to your father from me," Henry declared, "and none of your damn business, Cady."

"Alright," she said in mock defense, raising her hands slightly, "I'll back off." Then she rolled her eyes. As Henry set the basket down on the table, Vic raised the lid closest to us and I saw a bottle of… Champagne? - two glasses, and a couple of mysterious ceramic pots. There was something else in the bottom of the basket, but I couldn't see well enough to make out exactly what it was.

"This is sweet, Henry." Vic got up to place a kiss on his cheek. Henry did his best not to blush, but I noticed. It appeared Vic had a way with kisses, not just on me, but Henry as well.

"I wanna see!" Cady protested, but Henry closed the lid and took Cady by the hand.

"I believe it is time to let your Dad and Vic go for the night," he told her, "and it is time I shut this place down. You, Miss Cady, have been elected to help me."

I got to me feet, again, not as smoothly as I normally did and Vic was there to steady me.

"You're not driving, Dad." Cady ordered.

"Don't worry, I'll drive. I haven't been drinking," Vic informed her and that seemed to please Cady.

Before Henry could drag her away, she threw herself in my arms, almost knocking me over. She hugged me so tight I could barely breathe.

"I love you, Daddy," she whispered fiercely in my ear and she hadn't called me 'daddy' in years. It made me hug her back just as tightly and brought a rougher than normal gruffness to my voice.

"I love you, too, Punk," and I surely and deeply did. For a moment, she was my little girl…

All things die and are reborn Henry had said and just by her mere growing up, the little girl I'd held long ago had been reborn in to the wonderful, beautiful young woman I held in my arms. For the tiniest of moments, though, she truly was that sweet little girl, clinging to me, telling me she loved me.

All things die….

"I'm so happy for you," she continued in that same urgent whisper. "Mom would be happy, too, I know… and you deserve this, Daddy." I could feel her tears on my shoulder. "Don't screw it up, okay?" And I just had to laugh because my daughter thought she knew me so well.

"I'll try my best not to," I vowed to her. She gave my cheek a quick peck, just as she used to and made a face at the feel of my whiskers, as she always had. She pulled away a little and looked at Vic.

"Maybe you can convince him to shave on some kind of regular basis?" she suggested, but Vic just laughed.

"Sorry, but I like his whiskers," she said. Again, Cady rolled her eyes.

"Ok, you two are so obviously made for each other that it's almost too much." She removed herself from my embrace to wipe the tears from her eyes. She put one hand on Vic's arm and the other on the side of my face, in spite of the whiskers. She looked from one of us to the other.

"Take care of each other," she told us.

"Punk, this thing… It was just a ki – "

"We will," Vic interrupted and she gave Cady a hug of her own while giving me a serious look. Explanation to follow, I was sure. I grabbed my coat, shrugged in to it and set my hat just so on my head. I helped Vic with her coat and then grabbed Henry's forearm as he grabbed mine, the Cheyenne equivalent of a handshake.

"Thank you, Henry… for everything," I told him, knowing that he knew I referred to more than the goodies in the basket.

"You are always welcome, my brother. Anytime you need some… help, I will be here. Now," he continued, breaking our handshake, "you two get going and I will put Cady to work."

"Love you two," Cady called as Henry led her behind the bar.

"Love you," I returned. I grabbed the basket with one hand and the other I put on the back of Vic's waist as we made our way to the door. Most of the former patrons had already left and the few stragglers bid us goodnight as we pushed open the door and made our way out in to the winter's very early morning. I glanced at my watch; it was just after two AM, I think…

"Is everything okay?" Vic asked me as we headed for the truck.

"I think I might have drunk a bit too much," I informed her and I was having a little trouble negotiating the parking lot, but she held me up.

"Not like I haven't seen this before," she huffed good-naturedly, but then she got serious. "I meant is everything alright with you and Henry?"

"Oh. Yeah… everything's good between us. What about you and me?" That's what I was interested in knowing.

"We're good… I hope. Walt, I knew that PDA was a bit much for you. A leopard doesn't change its spots overnight and all," but I wasn't listening that well.

"P.D.A.?" I asked.

"Public Display of Affection," Vic clarified and I gave an ah-ha, like I should've known that… ya, okay then.

"Go on," I suggested.

"Well, I know it was all done in the heat of the moment; I get that…but Cady thinks this is a big deal, everyone thinks this is a big deal…"

"And is it?" I asked, truly wanting to know what she thought of it.

"It's… what _we_ think it is." and she seemed a little unsure of herself, which was okay by me because I didn't really know what it was, either. "It's big because we've crossed that invisible line between friend and more than friend… and it's big to me because a part of me's been waiting for you to kiss me…" and she really seemed flustered now, which was still okay by me.

"And it's big because we're going to cross that even bigger line between friend and lover…"

We had arrived at our destination. Vic took the basket from me and set it on the passenger side of the seat, and then she turned in to my arms and buried her hands inside my undone coat. She ran them up over my chest and brought them together behind my neck, her fingers buried in the hair that covered the collar of my shirt.

"We are, aren't we, Walt?" she asked with a bit of uncertainty. "If you've changed your mind…"

"I haven't, Vic…" I reassured her. I may not have been sure about Henry's telling me to simply accept things and I wasn't sure about what time it was, but I was more than sure that I wanted to make love to Vic…

"That's good," she breathed in relief against my throat, "because I want you to be my lover and I want to be yours," and just like that, a tidal wave of passion engulfed me. When she stood on her tiptoes to kiss me, I was gone; all thoughts of what Henry and I had talked about flew from my head. Omar's advice did not even register as a thought; all I was aware of was the warmth of Vic's body against mine, the feel of her lips, the taste and the heat of her mouth. It seemed like no time at all had passed since that first kiss, that there hadn't been all the interruptions and time-outs. I thought briefly of opening the back of the Bullet and just taking her right then and there. I wanted her beyond reason and I wanted her right now.

I picked her up so that her legs straddled my hips. I pinned her against the side of the truck and she responded to my aggressiveness with some of her own. One of her hands took my hat from my head and threw it in through the passenger side door. Both of her hands were now in my hair, pulling, twisting. She bit my bottom lip. I bit her back. She squirmed against me in an attempt to get even closer and I came to know the full meaning of a raging hard-on in that moment. From zero to sixty in two seconds flat…

"So," Vic gasped, looking me straight in the eye, "you tell me. Are we okay? Are you ready to be my lover?"

Without the alcohol muddling my mind and heightening my already singing senses, I might have been able to come up with some wonderful, intelligent sounding words to perhaps express what doubts I knew I did have buried somewhere under all my hormones. I might have been able to say that it wasn't ALL about sex… but at that moment that's exactly what is was all about! Even before I had started drinking, I'd been losing control of the situation and now, a few beers and multiple whiskeys later, I'd just given up completely. It was exactly what I had told Henry; I wanted Vic more than I'd ever, ever, EVER wanted any other woman in my entire post-pubescent life.

"If you want me as badly as I want you," I told her in the same breathless, gasping way, "then we're okay." I crushed her against the truck again, took her mouth with mine and held her with one hand while the other slid underneath her jacket to find the sweet swell of her breasts. She moaned in her throat and arched herself against me, begging me without words to keep on touching her… and then, she pushed against me, knocking me off balance with the suddenness of her actions and she was gone from my grasp.

She slammed the passenger side door shut and grabbed my hand, dragging me around the back of the truck.

"In," she commanded me as she yanked open the driver's side door. I obeyed.

"Move over," she insisted and again I complied. She jumped in and knocked down the visor. The keys fell in to her waiting hands. She slammed the visor back up and jammed the keys in to the ignition. She cranked the engine over and slammed the gear shift in to reverse, and when she looked over her shoulder to make sure the way was clear, I swear I'd never seen a woman look more beautiful than Vic did in that moment. A few strands of hair had come loose from her ponytail and framed her face like bits of golden silk. Her eyes were bright, on fire and her lips, swollen from our kissing. Her cheeks were flushed, her breathing exquisitely ragged.

She backed up just enough and then yanked the gearshift down to drive. She put that pedal to the metal and we tore out of the parking lot, fishtailing on the snow. She hit the lights and the sirens and we were out of there.

Technically, I should have given her hell for the lights and sirens. Personal use of said such was a violation, but while I was doing that I'd have to give her a ticket for speeding as well… and at the moment I had no idea where my violation pad was, so what the hell? If by chance anyone were to see us flying hell bent down the road, I could always say we had gotten a call… and really, I was the Sheriff. Was anyone going to question me about it? Like Vic always says, 'shit happens…'

…and seriously, why was I thinking of 'justification' when there were words that sounded just the same but were much more apropos? The word 'gratification' came to mind, which we obviously were both in need of and possible 'expiration', which I was surely going to suffer if 'gratification' was held out much longer. Okay then… those last two words made a compelling case for that little bugger 'justification'. This was now officially a medical emergency… and isn't it funny how your mind works when there's just a little too much alcohol swimming around in it?

"So, are we still okay?" I asked stupidly while a tiny sane part of my mind seemed to want to insist that perhaps whiskey wasn't the friend I had thought it was.

Unlike my mind, Vic was intent on the road ahead of us, both hands clutching the wheel while she tried to keep control of the vehicle. I couldn't resist; I ran a hand up and down her thigh.

"No" she answered emphatically and then she shot me a quick look. I saw a grin and, I swear, the Devil in her eyes.

"We're not okay. But we will be…"

I laughed and pulled down the zipper on her coat. She wasn't wearing her seatbelt; neither was I. Oh shit, we were gonna be in so much trouble if someone saw us. I laughed again because I was beyond the point of caring, beyond the point of thinking, almost beyond the point of speaking.

"Drive faster," I whispered in her ear, but I could barely get the words out.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: Well, here it is, Ch.5! Don't have much to say about this one except that I had fun writing it, even during the return of the dreaded stomach flu! Hope you all enjoy it:) Stay tuned, there's more! Not sure if it quite deserves an M rating, but didn't want to take the chance of getting kicked out of here! LOL I would also like to thank all of you for the kind reviews for Ch.4. Y'all just blew me away!:) Only hope you'll like this next one as much.**

**CHAPTER FIVE**:

I don't remember much about getting out of the truck. Don't know how the two of us ended up in the cabin. Don't think the alcohol was entirely to blame for those mental lapses, either. I was pretty damn sure it had more to do with Vic, with her eagerness to get inside where we could finally be alone…

I do remember lighting a fire; the cabin had been frigid and not at all conducive to the thought of removing any clothing and I do remember both Vic and I doing a quick check of the place, just to make sure there were no more surprises lurking around for us; namely Henry and or Omar. What order that had all happened in was hazy at best. All I knew for sure was that the cabin was warm and there were no surprises. Not bad surprises, anyway…

At long, sweet last, it was just the two of us. Our coats were gone, our boots and socks discarded, all the hardware of our profession out of the way, thrown aside God knows where….and really, who cared? Not me. I was only interested in getting Vic as close to me as possible. All I wanted to do was discover the exquisite mysteries of her body with my eyes, my hands, my lips and it appeared she cared as little for the technicalities as I did. We were on the same wavelength when it came to exploring each other and that was good enough for me.

God! While the alcohol had dulled my thought processes, it had definitely heightened the rest of my senses. I was on fire. I swear I could feel myself burning up from the inside out. I don't think I'd ever been so horny in my entire long life. My whole body was throbbing, blood pounding in my ears. Electricity was in our mad groping, mouths so wet and hot, breath so badly needed but only gasped for. She touched me as I touched her, all over, everywhere. Grasping, pulling, tearing, desperate.

When her hands tried to make their way down the front of my jeans, I had to stop her. I didn't want to, but if she touched me there, it was going to be all over while both of us were still standing. And I didn't want it to be over that way.

I grasped her wrists with my big hands and a heavy pause accompanied that action. We stood staring at each other, breathing hard. I felt the tension all around me, desire like a vacuum, leaving us in that moment; isolated. Hyper-aware.

She brought her hands up to either side of the collar on my shirt, despite my hold on them. Her eyes never left mine; mine focused on hers. We stared at each other, panting…waiting. Vic hadn't wanted to stop. Defiance blazed from her eyes.

"I'm gonna lose it", I whispered the warning. Her fingers tightened on the fabric of my shirt. I felt her shaking but she wouldn't back down.

"Let's just start with losing _**this**_", she growled.

I saw the smoldering fire in her eyes erupt in to flame as she somehow got her hands out of my grasp and literally ripped my shirt wide open. From somewhere so very far away, I heard the buttons clatter across the wooden floor and still, she never took her eyes from mine. She'd moved back a few paces and only broke eye contact long enough to check out what she'd exposed. The tip of her tongue ran invitingly over her bottom lip as she surveyed my naked chest with blatant satisfaction.

In a split mindless moment, my hands were at the collar of her shirt and I tore the thin fabric right down the middle, leaving her standing before me, gasping, the soft yellow of her lacy bra exposed. The inviting swell of her breasts became my focus….and she laughed, a throaty, breathless laugh that let me know I had played right in to her hands.

Adam must have felt like this when Eve stood before him, glorious in her nakedness, the apple in her hand held out invitingly to him, one small bite missing from it. Vic seemed to be saying to me, 'take this, you'll love it' and I was as powerless to deny her as Adam must have been in the face of Eve's offering. Vic was a supreme temptress…and an even bigger tease, as I was about to find out.

I went to grab her, wanting to free her breasts from their confinement, wanting to feel their weight and fullness in my hands, wanting to experience the sweet erectness of her nipples against my naked chest, in my mouth, all over me. Instead, she put her hand out, strong against my chest, her fingers threaded through the hair there, twisting just enough to distract me.

"Wait", she ordered me and I could only stand there looking at her like a panting idiot, curious enough to wonder what she was up to. Frustrated as hell, but curious just the same. Somewhere along the line, her hair had been set free of its ponytail and it fell, soft and long over her shoulders, tousled and wild about her face. She was so damn beautiful! So sexy with those big golden eyes, so inviting with that wide, wonderful mouth and those lips!

"I need a drink," she breathed, softly, seductively and she bent down with one graceful, fluid motion before I could stop her and taste those lips again. My eyes went straight to the cleavage her position exposed and I had to lick my own lips, run a hand distractedly over my jaw, trying anything to keep myself from falling to my knees and going after her breasts.

In an instant, she was upright once more; the bottle of champagne Henry had provided us with in her delicate hands. I watched her long, slender fingers caress the neck of the bottle while she watched my reaction. Oh, there was the Devil I'd seen on the wild ride here. I remembered THAT. She knew what she was doing to me and she was enjoying every agonizing, delicious moment of it.

Could a man get any harder without exploding? Could a body throb so deeply without imploding? As I watched her fingers slip under the foil at the top of the bottle, I was confident that I was about to find out the answers to my questions.

Before my eyes, she was making the bottle do its own strip tease and teased I most definitely was! Of their own volition, my hands went to my belt, undid the buckle while my eyes never left the spectacle Vic was putting on before me. I needed….room. I need release. I needed to stop watching her….but I couldn't.

I undid the buttons of my 501's while Vic undid the wrapping on the bottle. When she got down to the naked cork, she caressed it with her palm in a swirling motion that I wished to God she was doing to my hard-on. I groaned, low in my throat and she gave that laugh again, low, husky, satisfied with the way she was getting to me. If there was ever a woman who truly embodied the true meaning of the word 'vixen', it was Vic. As lithe and graceful as a fox, as playful and stunningly beautiful, she was bewitching to watch.

God, I wanted her! I wanted her to touch me, grasp me the way she was grasping that bottle. I wanted to be that bottle, but she was defying me still, teasing me to the point of making me grasp myself….but if I did, it would be over. Just the simple act of adjusting that traitorous bulge in my pants nearly sent me over the edge and I removed my hand quickly, gasping, and found the edge of the counter behind me instead. I gripped it as if my life depended on hanging on to it. Maybe it was my life in jeopardy because I was sure I was going to suffer either a heart attack or a seizure of monumental proportions if Vic didn't stop what she was doing.

Men only thought they had power. In truth, women held it all in their delicate, soft, sweet hands. They could bring us to our knees with a touch, make us weak with a whisper, kill us with a look and oh, the look Vic was giving me right now as she wiggled the cork back and forth with her fingers was surely going to be the death of me. It was definitely a threat to my eager manhood. That stupid, headstrong selfish sonofabitch didn't seem to have the sense to hide itself or even seek shelter. Instead, it was doing its best to urge me on.

"Take her! Grab her; throw her down on that big, old couch! Rip her clothes off, spread her legs wide, and plunge me deep inside! Drown me in her honeyed sea; wrap me in her heat. JUST DO IT! KILL ME! I'll spill my guts and I'll shut up!"

Jesus, I was panting like a rabid wolf. I heard the counter crack where I gripped it.

"Don't listen to him", my brain swooped in. Apparently, it was still alive, just a little sluggish from the whiskey.

"Be strong. Calm down. If you listen to that stupid prick, it's all over and you're going to look like a fool. You're a grown-ass man for God's sake, not some mindless, over-sexed teenager. YOU CAN DO THIS!"

I could almost see my brain with its little stick legs and arms, waving around a couple of pom-poms while it jumped up and down like some Varsity league cheerleader. It was the battle of the century, folks – Brain versus Prick, guaranteed to be a knockdown, drag-out fight…or so I hoped. If I were a betting man, I'd put my money on The Prick, but as it was, my pride was at stake here so I went with The Brain. The odds seemed to be about a million to one. Either way, it was going to be a long shot…

In that moment, I knew that a man was nothing more than a schizophrenic Neanderthal, set loose upon the earth as some kind of walking joke to women….but hey, when you were born with two heads, what else was there to expect? And when I actually found myself in a battle with my self, I knew that I most certainly did think way, way, way too much or was just drunker than I felt I was. More than likely, a combination of both things. Whatever, the bottom line was this – Vic was running the show, driving the train and all I could do was stand in front of her, frozen like a stupid deer just begging to be creamed all over the tracks! I could not move even if I 'd wanted to….and why, oh why, hadn't I thought 'run over' instead of 'creamed'?

Yeah, The Prick was winning. Not so stupid after all. The Brain must've been taking five and missed that one…

"C'mon, buddy", I mentally encouraged him, "a little help here, okay?" I must have at least moved my lips because Vic stopped her wiggling of the cork long enough to shoot me an enquiring glance, her one eyebrow raised, her lips quirked.

"Nothin'", I panted, "don't worry about it," and she didn't. Women could control their brains. What they apparently couldn't control were corks.

That sucker shot out from that tight opening like a bullet from the barrel of a high-powered rifle, its expulsion loud enough to ring my ears. It startled the hell out of Vic and she gave a little scream, but judging by the way she was laughing, she was delighted with her accomplishment. A froth of white bubbles shot almost to the ceiling and then golden liquid erupted from the opening of the bottle to run free and wild down its sides. Vic shook out one wet hand and used the other to bring the bottle to her lips to take a healthy swig. I watched the muscles in her neck working, the slight swell of her delicate Adam's apple moving up and down. Up. And. Down.

"Please", I begged silently and fervently, "don't let me be the champagne! Don't let me be the CHAMPAGNE!"

Too late.

I swear I felt The Brain take it square on the chin and down he went, lights completely out! The Prick stood there for a moment, shocked, but I felt him gearing up for his victory dance. All I could think to do was bend over, stick my hands between my legs, press down as hard as I could and just pray. The gods must've been on their way out the door, distracted by trying to fight their way through the crowd at the FIGHT OF THE CENTURY. They never heard me or chose to ignore me; it didn't matter which, really. It was over. I was done for. I WAS the champagne!

"Walt?" I could hear her, the soft concern in her voice, but I couldn't see her. I had my eyes squeezed shut so tightly that it almost hurt. A groan started somewhere inside me, deep and guttural, and made its way up to escape from between my lips. I felt her hand on my shoulder and then I did look up. I was hunkered down. She stood above me, in front of me and comprehension dawned in her dancing eyes. I saw her mouth make an O of surprise.

I couldn't stand to have her see me this way, not like this. I jumped to my feet, her hand flying off me. I spun around, pressing myself in to the counter. I clamped my eyes shut again, my head falling back as I tried my damnedest to halt the victory celebration going on in my pants. Breathing had become a supreme effort; I could only gasp like a drowning man.

"Oh! Oh…" the waves took me, the spasms started me shaking, and the tidal wave was only seconds away. I felt her hand on my back.

"Walt…"

I knew she was leaning around me, trying to get me to look at her, but I couldn't. My blood was pounding in my head; The Prick was dancing in my pants and if felt like everything inside of me was trying to make its way out of me, clamouring for the only exit that mattered.

"Oh…FUCK!"

It was over. The Prick had won.

It had been so long that I'd forgotten that The Prick ALWAYS wins and he was celebrating like he'd never celebrated before! I was no stranger to the pleasures of masturbation, but Jesus! It must've been Vic's closeness; her leaning around me that really kicked the party in to high gear. It might even have been her touch, the way her breath had quickened, the heat of it on my chest and neck. Whatever it was, I felt like I was going to die. As if I was going to keep on cumming until I crumpled to the floor in a mess of twitching, shuddering muscles.

My legs were already weak, my arm muscles twitching horribly as they held my weight. My head had fallen forward and I felt spittle run from my mouth. I opened my eyes as wave after wave of release took over me. I watched the clear line of saliva grow longer, joined by a few tears falling from my eyes. Anything liquid in my body had decided to abandon ship; humiliation knew no friends.

After what felt like an eternity, my muscles began to relax and breathing wasn't quite the chore it had been. I felt steady and strong enough to bring a hand up to my nose and give it a wipe. One last shudder passed through me as Vic rubbed my back. With its passing, silence surrounded us, broken only by my breathing. Still too fast, but getting better.

"Walt…" she tried again, her hand on my shoulder now, trying to get me to turn and face her. I wasn't going to do it; I couldn't do it! I didn't want to see it in her eyes. Pity? Disappointment? Disgust, even? I did not want to see any of it.

Breathe. In and out. Wipe my face with the dangling side of my shirt. Keep breathing, nice and steady. Stop shaking; stop sweating. Just breathe…and so I did. It filled the silence. With the release came other things.

One, I could think a little better, but I wasn't going there for a change. Two, I was definitely feeling woozy and for that big old three, my eyes decided to focus on myself, on that traitorous bastard, his head just visible above the waistband of my boxers as he slowly began his fade in to oblivion, leaving behind the evidence of his unbridled exuberance. All over my belly. On the counter. Down the front of my jeans. I was a sticky mess. A wobbling, sticky, humiliated mess of a man and what did I do now?

As if hearing that question, Vic stuck something in front of my face. I took it. It was what remained of her shirt. Somehow, that made me feel worse…

"You said the eff word", she whispered close to my ear as I wiped at myself…and was she giggling? Oh, yeah, she was giggling like a school girl! I couldn't help it; the shock, mixed with delighted wonder in her voice got to me. Despite making a fool of myself, I laughed. It sounded more like a grunt of pain to begin with, but then it sorted itself out and became almost normal. What the hell else was I supposed to do? She rubbed my back, the way she had when Cady was laying in that hospital bed, unconscious. Slowly, gently.

"I'm sorry, Vic…" I whispered, all shaky, still unable to face her.

"It's okay, Walt", she whispered back. "I shouldn't have…pushed you."

"I feel like an idiot. It wasn't supposed to end this way."

"It's not going to" she told me softly. "Turn around. Please, Walt…" Her hand was on my shoulder again, but this time, she wasn't letting me shrug it off. She insisted with her strength and so I turned, but I still couldn't look at her. I held her torn shirt all bunched up in my hands, trying to hide the evidence of my downfall.

"Here, take this," and she shoved the bottle of champagne up in my face while she tugged her shirt from my hands. I looked at the bottle; it seemed better than looking at her. If ever there was a time I needed a drink, this was it.

Vic had moved away to the kitchen sink. I heard the water running. I brought the bottle to my lips and tilted my head back, wanting to take the biggest swig of my life. At first, it was okay but then the bubbles hit me and I sputtered. How the hell had Vic managed to chug half the bottle at one time when I could only get down a few swallows? Contemplating that seemed better than dealing with my untimely ejaculation so I went with it. Now that the FIGHT OF THE CENTURY was over, it was time to move on to other things, like figuring out how I was supposed to drown my sorrows in a sea full of bubbles. I gave it another shot; it was easier this time around, but still not my thing.

Then Vic was in front of me again, her shirt, now wet, in one hand and an ice-cold beer in the other. She was reading my mind, had to be. I had no choice but to look at her as I set the champagne bottle down on the counter behind me where it wobbled and teetered but managed to stay upright; it was doing a lot better than I was. I accepted the beer. To my relief, all I saw in her eyes was a smile and a touch of concern. She placed the shirt on my belly. It was warm.

"You don't have to do that", I told her. She pushed my hand away.

"Just drink your beer and be quiet", she commanded. "I'll clean you up and it'll be okay."

"Vic – "I began to protest. She cut me off.

"I want to do this, Walt! It's my fault", and she sounded contrite enough and adamant enough that I knew better than to go against her.

Vic was her very own force of nature as I'd found out on several other less personal occasions and even though I was still uncomfortable about the whole thing, I had to admit that it felt good to have her take care of me. I just wondered if I was going to be able to take care of her. I drank my beer while she cleaned me off, my mind wandering.

"We'll start over", I heard her say.

I brought myself back from the buzzed out zone to find her no longer standing in front of me but kneeling before me. I'd been trying my damnedest to persuade His Royal Righteousness to stand up and go for another round, but all my efforts had seemed in vain. It only took the sight of Vic on her knees and the sensation of her hands sliding under the waistband of my shorts to bring the Champ back to life. He was a far cry from the hero he had been, but he was stirring.

"Just finish your beer, Walt. Close your eyes and relax."

There was that grin again, that smoldering fire in her eyes. Why did I always feel so helpless when she looked at me like that? Why did I feel the need to quietly obey her and finish my beer as she'd told me to? Because The Prick was coming back to life and The Brain, while functioning only a moment ago, had decided to send up the white flag and just simply surrender. Poor drunken, beat-up Brain. But hey, Prick, nice comeback! The helping hand Vic was lending him sure didn't hurt, either. In fact, it felt –

"Oh, shit!" I actually dropped my beer in sheer shock. Luckily, there wasn't much left of it, but it still made a nice thud as it hit the floor and why the hell was I noticing that when Vic was giving The Prick what amounted to mouth to Prick resuscitation? She took the time to gasp her own surprise and delight; at least it sounded like delight to my ears. Yeah, the Champ was back!

"Sweet Jesus!" My hands were back on the edge of the counter behind me, holding on for dear life once more. I was going to rip the damn thing right off if this kept on much longer! I wasn't a religious man so why was I calling out like I was? All that was missing was a plea to the Holy Spirit, but in the presence of The Devil, a man seemed eager to call upon all kinds of saints and angels for salvation.

I looked down. The Devil knelt before me. She'd slid my jeans and my underwear down to my ankles and she was doing things to me with her mouth that I had never even dreamed of, let alone experienced. Just like that, she'd lit the fuse and the fire was raging once more. Incredible! Never thought I was capable of such a quick repeat performance, but then again, I'd never been with Vic before, never been with a woman as wanton or wicked as she was; never been with that many women in plain fact. The Devil. _My_ Devil.

Oh, I could ride this all the way to the end of the line. I could let her pleasure me until the end of days, but not this time. Not this time! As much as I was enjoying this, I had to stop it. I reached down, grabbed her arms and pulled her up to me. She slid up my body like liquid silk. I held her there with one arm around her waist, the other around her upper back, my hand cradling the nape of her neck.

"I told you it wasn't over," she laughed breathlessly, looking deep in to my eyes. Her face was flushed, her eyes burning.

"That mouth of yours, always causing trouble". I laughed; I couldn't stop myself.

"Oh", she replied, her voice all soft and husky, "it was no trouble at all…"

Maybe cumming in my jeans hadn't been such a bad thing after all. That was over and done. I was hard as steel once more, more than ready and able to start round two and while the fire was just as hot and all-consuming as it had been, the urgency for release wasn't as demanding this time around.

This time, I didn't feel as out of control. This time, I was going to take this woman in my arms and show her a thing or two. I had my own Devil inside and when I smiled at her, I made sure to let him show. No holding him back, no stopping it now.

From Vic's reaction, she eagerly welcomed this part of me; kindred spirits had just hooked up. This was what we both wanted, what we both needed and I took that mouth of hers that had raised the dead and crushed it under my own. I could taste myself on her lips.

"Guess we're gonna see about that", I breathed.

I unhooked her bra while she pushed my shirt over my shoulders. I unfastened her belt and undid her jeans, pushing them down to join mine and she exhaled with relief and more against my bare chest. She got my shirt all the way off and we stood there, naked before each other. I felt myself go weak at the sight of her; she was so damn beautiful. So perfect in her desire. It was in her eyes, in her rapid breathing, her slight trembling. She wanted me.

Her uniform had never hidden her womanly assets, but my god, to see her naked and eager before me made me want to fall down at her feet and declare that I was not worthy, but I wasn't going to do that. The darker, deeper side of me was in control, that side that made me do things without any thought to the consequences. It was rage, but rage of a different sort. No confusion as to what it was. it was pure lust, pure desire and Vic was sending it right back to me. I felt like I had the moment we'd first kissed, but this time, all I wanted to do was keep on feeling and doing.

I ran my hands over her breasts, over her hard nipples. Over her smooth, flat belly. Slid one of them lower to that hot place between her legs. Felt her moist and slick. Ready. She moaned at my touch, her eyes closing, lips parting as she shifted her weight ever so slightly, inviting me to keep on touching her. Oh, I was going to, no doubt about that, but not here. Not like this.

No more thinking.

The Prick was the ultimate victor, plain and simple. Ready for round two. And The Brain? He was a goner. I kicked him to the curb as I kicked my jeans and underwear away from my feet. I swept Vic up in my arms, carried her to the couch and practically threw her down. She laughed. She opened her arms to me and I dived right in. The Devil was alive and dancing in Durant and yet strangely, I'd never felt closer to Heaven.

No. More. Thinking.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: So, at long last, here is part I of Ch.6:) Thanks for your patience. Work, life and the fact that Walt's 'other-wise occupied' made getting this out here a little tricky. Only hope the wait was worth it! *fingers crossed*. It helped that a certain someone kept poking me with a stick and that another certain someone decided to find 'other' fan fiction to read and let me know about it - how could you? LOL. Have to mention the awesome reviews y'all left me for Ch5. You make me blush with delight and I'm so glad so many of you really enjoyed it! THANKS SO MUCH! Also, there's another certain someone who shared her own Ch5 story with me and I'm still laughing about it! Champagne? LOL. So, here it is...I know you all will let me know what you think and I can hardly wait! Good, bad or indifferent, I'd like to hear what you think...and yes, I am working on part 2; have most of it written. Now I just have to get it in order! LOL:)**

**Chapter 6 – Part I**

Oh, yeah…this was good. Lying here in that limbo state between sleeping and waking…the time when the Spirits were closest to us, as Henry would say. Didn't know for sure if the Spirits were around, but I knew who was.

Vic. In my arms. Her head on my shoulder. Her lean, warm body against me, both of us naked, pressed together under a thin blanket I'd spent many a night under by myself. One of her strong legs thrown over mine, an arm draped across my waist, the other snugged up against us. I had one arm around her shoulders, the other tucked in so that my hand rested just above my heart. I lay there, in that dream state, toying with the hair on my chest, unaware of the time or the day. Not caring about anything except being in this moment, feeling her so soft upon me…

I had my eyes closed. I was floating. Laying on the couch, but feeling like I was lying on a cloud. Listening to the fire in the hearth crackle from a million miles away. Seeing the light it gave off behind my eyelids – pale orange and black. Dancing, weaving, entwined. Could smell the wood smoke and sweetgrass. Could smell leather, sweat and sex. All of it so earthy, so natural, so old and yet new.

I felt…wonderful. I felt blissfully stoned. I felt free. I felt like I hadn't felt in years. Had I ever really felt this…content? The word wasn't strong enough.

Relaxed? Too mild and not mild enough.

Transcendental? That was closer, but still not it.

I didn't know if I could describe exactly how I felt and why was I trying to? There were other things to think about…

My fire, that thing I'd been so worried about, had met Vic's fire and if I could open my eyes, it wouldn't surprise me at all to find the whole cabin burnt down around us. Hell, it wouldn't even surprise me to find the land scorched as far as the eye could see, even in the dead of winter, buried two feet under the snow! Probably saw the flames all the way from town. Picturing that made me chuckle.

"What's so funny, Walt?" She whispered the question and her breath caressed my neck like feathers. It made me wonder if I had any feathers around here so I could tickle her back with them. That sounded like fun…and she sounded as out of it as I felt. Not a bad phrase, but still not right.

Surreal? Hhmm, not bad, but still not it.

Exalted? Implied too much energy.

Sublime? Maybe…

"I think we just burned down the whole state of Wyoming," I whispered back. I didn't have the energy to speak any louder and even if I did, I wouldn't have. This place, this time, this moment felt…sacred. Maybe we were in the Land of the Spirits. Maybe we'd killed each other with sex and gone to the Lodge in the Sky. That was another thing that would not have surprised me one little bit. Death by sex; it made me smile.

Sacred? Had to think about that one…

"Pretty sure I heard sirens," she replied. I could hear the smile in her soft voice. Her breath sent tingles down my spine. I laughed quietly and tightened my arm around her. She snuggled in even closer.

Content? No, I'd already tried that one.

"You're not thinkin' about getting' up, are ya?" She sounded so sexy, all drowsy and soft.

"Well, I mean, I could…if you really want me to. Might have to give me a hand though" and wasn't I just too witty for words?

"Oh, my god! You're a pig, Walt!" but she didn't really sound indignant. Just as I began to laugh, she smacked my less than rock-hard abs, making me groan and laugh at the same time, still quietly, though. Still sacred. I was going to have to start working on my soft spots, especially after seeing and feeling how toned, sleek and strong Vic was. Oh, but she had her curves, too and I was definitely feeling the softness of her breasts pressed against me…

"Always knew you'd be insatiable," she purred. She was running her hand up and down over my chest now. Damn, that felt nice.

"Right, you _knew_ it" I scoffed. "Did you use your investigative skills to figure that out, Vic?" Wow, I was on a real comedic roll here. Just stonin' along…

"Didn't have to, smartass!"

"So, you're psychic?"

"Don't have to be. You telegraph from at least a mile away, Walt."

"Bullshit!" I scoffed. I swear I could feel her smirking.

"Yeah, right…first of all, you've got those crazy blue eyes. They go from faded denim to indigo, depending on your mood" and while she was saying that, she'd moved on me and I had to open my eyes. She was lying right on top of me, her chin resting on her hands, which were plopped one on top of the other, resting on my chest. I stopped playing with my chest hair and ran both hands up over her shoulders and down her sides. Reversed the movement and repeated, over and over. Talk about crazy eyes! Hers were doing that devil dance again.

"You are so full of shit," I told her with a smile. She was hypnotizing me, again.

"Whatever, Walt. You're the one with the eyes like heat gauges. When you're being all disdainful, they're that kind of grey- blue. When you're getting pissed off, they turn cerulean…and when you're really ready to blow, they look like sapphires. Cold to hot by colours."

"Now who's the smartass? Cerulean? Nice choice, but so what? When I'm disdainful, which I never am" and she dared to laugh at that, "they're light blue. When I'm mad, they're dark blue. What about that leads you to me being insatiable?"

"Mad, horny, same temperature, different outcomes…usually" and when she quirked that smile at me, I knew she was reading my mind again. Now that I wasn't quite drifting anymore, I did feel a little like that time Hector had beat the shit out of me, but I'd won that fight. Vic played dirty, though, deliciously dirty…and I had an inkling this 'fight' wasn't over just yet. Pretty sure The Prick was just out having a smoke…

"Your eyes were definitely sapphire back there in the kitchen, Walt" and that little vixen actually winked at me. I could feel the flush of embarrassment creep up in to my face. I should've felt more than embarrassed, the way I had at the time, even if I had redeemed myself after that little 'champagne' incident, and quite admirably, if I do say so. I was just too blissed-out to really feel anything but. Still not the words I was looking for, but closer.

It dawned on me that I really wasn't feeling quite right in the head at all.

Let's see, The Prick was out back, takin' five and The Brain? Last I saw him, he was skidding towards the curb, but somehow, he must've snuck back, dragging himself like a sponge through all the alcohol in my system and so, he was back, but jeez, was he tipsy! Holy Christ, had I really had that much to drink?

"I call 'fail' on the eyes, Vic "and yeah, where was I getting these lines from? Oh, yeah, SpongeBrain NoPants! Nice, buddy, real nice. Soo not glad to kind of have you back. Well, you could only work with what you had.

"Your temperature chart doesn't cut it. Better try something else."

"Okay, how about the way you move?"

"What, like a fifty-four year old guy who's been beat up and busted a few too many times? Geez, that sounds sexy and insatiable!" SpongeBrain was actually kind of funny.

Vic just kept on giving me that quirky smile with those smouldering eyes of hers, totally unfazed and unimpressed with my comedic skills.

"I guess a guy who spends his life seeing so much in others really doesn't have much time to see himself very well," and was it just my imagination or was Vic sounding a little slurry herself now that we'd both opened our eyes?

"You never do get to see yourself move, I s'pose, so you wouldn't know. You're like water, Walt…fluid, almost graceful – and no, don't cringe! Men can be graceful and still be men. It's hard to describe, sorry. You're natural, in tune with yourself and the earth, always flowing, never hurried. You're like watching a lazy river on a hot summer day. Relaxed, loose, but ready for anything. Your movements imply sensuality."

Yeah, Vic was out of it. She hadn't used the word 'fuck' once in that little monologue. She actually sounded more like my thoughts when I was sober and my thoughts now sounded more like her when she was straight. What a weird night/day….and what a nice way Vic had of describing me, but talk about looking at things through rose coloured glasses! I wasn't like that!

"That sounded more like a guided meditation than it did a case for me being insatiable," I mused with a smile. I wasn't going to make this easy for her. She still owed me for that champagne trick of hers.

"You get one more try at this, Vic." Had to give her credit for not giving up. She wasn't even getting pissed at me! Where did MY Vic go? This was interesting, though or at least it seemed to be.

"Okay. Let's move on to the way you touch yourself…"

"Uh, hey…I know I've never done that, not around you, anyway!"

"You do it all the time, Walt! You just can't leave yourself alone!"

What the hell?

"When you're thinkin', you run a finger over your lips" and she showed me what she meant by running one of _her_ fingers over _my_ lips. Nice.

"And when you're really thinkin', you nibble on it, just a little bit" and she nudged _my_ lips apart, putting just the tip of _her_ finger between my teeth. I nibbled, gently. Very nice.

"And when you're really perplexed, impatient or driving you run a hand along your jaw, over your chin" and _her_ hand slid along _my_ jaw, over _my_ chin, rasping against my stubble like I'd never heard it rasp before. Making those whiskers stand right up and beg for more. Oh, this was getting…interesting.

"And when you sleep, you play with the hair on your chest" and she slid her hand down to my chest, plucking ever so gently on my hairs. This had become downright stimulating.

I had to swallow. My hands slid down her back, under the blanket that covered her from the waist down, found the tight curve of her ass and squeezed, urging her up my body, just a little. She gave a tiny gasp and wiggled up me. Now, her face was so close to mine.

I really didn't care anymore about the way she'd come up with thinking I was insatiable, but I was interested in knowing when she'd seen me sleeping. The only time that came to mind was when I'd slept in the truck at that barn fire. She hadn't been with me, but she'd brought me coffee in the morning, waking me up with a knock on the door and a jaunty 'room service' jape. I'd been bundled up pretty good in there. It had been a cold night.

I did play with my chest hairs when I was drifting off to sleep. I found it relaxing, therapeutic, almost. I'm sure she hadn't seen me do it in the time we'd just spent together.

"You are full of it, Vic. When have you ever seen me sleeping? Not now, I know that."

"You actually were just doing it," she informed me, "but I've seen you do it before. Let's just say I'm not the only one to spend a night or two in the jail cell and you aren't the only one who's ever come in to the office early."

Oh, yeah, I remembered coming in to the office in the early hours of the morning to find Vic sitting on the bunk wearing a tank top and jeans, her messy hair and sleepy eyes telling me she'd spent the night there. It had been a little awkward for both of us. And yes, I'd spent a night or ten there, too, but the only person who'd ever caught me actually sleeping was Ruby and she was used to my ways. If she'd ever found it strange, she'd never shown it. She'd even gone so far as to keep a toothbrush, a comb and a razor there for me. Yeah, the razor never got used; Ruby never stopped trying. It was our pattern. I'd never run in to Vic, though. Never _just_ Vic. The whole gang had caught me, once, but I'd heard them coming up the stairs and I know I hadn't been playing with my chest hair. Groggy, sure, but not that groggy.

"You watched me sleeping?" I had no idea.

"I did", she told me, becoming serious. "Back then, it was the only time I ever saw you looking less stressed. I couldn't help myself, Walt. I wanted to know if you ever found any peace".

'Back then'. That's how we'd come to refer to probably the darkest time in the history of the department.

"I don't think any of us did".

I felt a sobering want to come over me when I thought about the way things had been a year ago. I ran my hands back up Vic's body and hugged her to me, instinctively, as if protecting her. Holding her tight in an effort to protect myself as well? Maybe. I felt old SpongeBrain clumsily trying to make me go back there.

Back then.

I let go with one hand and grabbed at the can of beer on the coffee table. It was still half-full, warm, but what the hell? I took a long drink, offered it to Vic. She took a sip and handed it back to me. She turned her head to the side, laying it flat on my chest again. She slid off me, but kept an arm and a leg over me.

The fire hissed and spat before going back to its soothing crackle. I watched the shadows dance on the wall, the ceiling. I felt myself drifting again, but this time, I carried the weight of the world with me. The weight of being the Sheriff when Hell had come to Absaroka County.

No, not hell. Worse than that. Bad Medicine had come to town, preceded by the Dog Soldiers, accompanied by avenging spirits and mad, insane demons. The Cheyenne version of Dante's Inferno. Was I being slightly melodramatic to remember it that way? I really didn't think so…

The two years before had been bad enough, but that last year – that had just been insane! A whirlpool of worlds colliding, trains going off the track, past and present coming full circle to smash in to each other, headlong. Ghosts in the storm. Riders on the plains. Murder in the mountains. And the owls, watching me with their eyes. Messengers of Death. Maybe this was the time of the Spirits after all…

Bad Medicine.

I felt a shiver run through me.

"You okay?" Vic asked with soft concern. I grabbed old Sponge-Brain away from that abyss of remembrance and set him forcefully on what passed for his ass. I set my beer aside, too. No way we're going there, buddy. Not now. Not when I could be HERE, with Vic. I slipped back in to the spacey state. I closed my eyes again and hugged her even closer to me.

"You got me on the chest hair," I told her with a touch of forced lightness. "Now, just kiss me," I whispered and she did. She did and I tasted strawberries on her lips, in her mouth. Henry had given us strawberries and whipped cream in the basket. So hokey, I'd thought once we'd discovered them, but 'hokey' became' hot' once Vic got creative with it all. We'd shared them in the most erotic ways and remembrances of the past were blown away with the remembrance of the things that had gone on between us. As our kiss intensified, I felt The Prick think about cutting his smoke break short. Vic felt it, too.

"Insatiable," she whispered against my mouth, drawing out the word, making it feel like silk against my lips. She laughed as she ran her hands through my hair. I was thinking about the champagne again, how the bottle had somehow ended up in the living room with us, how I'd found it and poured it over her breasts and licked it off. How she'd taken it from me and doused me back, how she'd found her own ways to clean it off all of me. SpongeBrain was back at it again, filling my head with images I never could have dreamt of. Images of the only reality I cared about at the moment. I'd go with SpongeBrain on this one.

Fire on fire. Fantasy beyond fantasizing. Flying without fear. Higher and higher, our fingers interlaced so tightly it's a wonder I hadn't broken any delicate bones in her hands. She could've easily broken mine with the strength in hers as we flew together to Paradise. Up and up. Faster, harder until both of us had exploded together in an orgasmic shattering of EVERYTHING!

Coming down like feathers floating from the sky to land softly together, so tangled up in each other that I'd had no idea of where she started and I ended. Resting together, caressing each other , coming back to earth. Kissing her softly and tasting tears on her cheeks, her chin. Knowing she was crying not from pain but with the exquisite release of it all.

That was before we even got in to Henry's goodies. Resting together and then dessert came along. Managed to get the strawberries and whipped cream out of the basket before it was knocked to the floor. Don't think it really mattered to either one of us what else might have been in there. I had heard a _thunk_, but hadn't bothered to investigate. Who cared?

Dessert had led to another shot to the sky, and I remembered thinking it was totally bizarre that the Devil was taking me to Heaven all over again and after that, there'd been no more thinking.

And now, here we lay, wrapped up in each other all over again. I could feel the stickiness of the champagne and whipped cream between us and something more.

"Insatiable," I whispered back. "Just like you." I opened my eyes. She opened hers.

"It's not the colour of my eyes," I continued quietly. "You just saw yourself reflected in them." She gave me such a look; part surprise, part lust.

"The way you see yourself in mine?" Oh, yes, all that and so much more.

"I never looked so damn good." I stated quietly. And was I insatiable? I surely was when it came to Vic.

I went to roll her over but this old couch suddenly seemed too small for the things I had in mind. I somehow managed to get to my feet, amazingly enough, still hanging on to her. It helped that she'd wrapped those beautiful, strong, sleek legs of hers around my hips. Her slender arms wound around my neck.

The first step towards the bedroom was a little dicey; almost fell back on the couch. I made it to the bedroom, though. Gently, softly, we collapsed together on top of the blankets. Wrapped up in each other, we rolled together, like waves on the ocean, thunder in the sky. From above her, I looked down at her. So goddamned beautiful. I ran a hand along the side of her face, a thumb across her lips as she smiled dreamily up at me.

"I love you, Vic…" The words passed quietly through my lips as natural as breathing. And just like breathing, I paid them little attention, as though I'd never agonized over saying them. Funny how that happened in the heat of the moment.

In the dim firelight that crept in to the bedroom, I saw flames burning in her eyes as she raised herself up towards me. The moment her lips met mine, I was gone again. I didn't even care that she hadn't said she loved me back. Didn't even think about it.

In my head, I saw The Prick get old SpongeBob NoPants in a sleeper hold and once that guy was out cold, that buddy of mine held up those two tickets to Paradise. He was grinning, I swear, if you can imagine that. I didn't have to imagine the trip we were headed on. I'd already been there and I was going, again. It was becoming my all-time favourite journey and I couldn't wait to head out.

Vic pushed me over on to my back, but in all honesty, I was willing to be pushed so it was easy for her. I'd let her have her way, this time. I'd have mine later. She climbed on top of me, straddled me, poised like a huntress above me. So close…just mere inches and I'd be enveloped by that sweet, wet heat of hers. She smiled like the temptress she was, like the devil I knew her to be and I welcomed her with a hungry smile of my own. It occurred to me that the word I'd been looking for way back when had been 'sated' but apparently, that adjective had never really applied; I just hadn't known it.

"You'll appreciate this," she told me, all sultry and soft. "For your animal lover's heart, I'm about to save a horse and ride the sexiest fuckin' cowboy I've ever seen…" and oh, yeah, MY Vic was back. I closed my eyes, a soft groan escaping me as she let herself down on top of me. Slowly, exquisitely and yes, it was transcendental and sacred. Both of us were insatiable...


	7. Chapter 6 - Part II

** Author's note: Part II...Walt wakes up. I mean, he REALLY wakes up, finally:) Hope you enjoy it, especially my flu-suffering 'friend'. Think of this as home-made chicken soup!:) Oh, and by the way, Chapter 7 isn't far behind this. When you stay up ALL night listening to Walt talk, you get things done! LOL:) If there's typos in this, just blame him:)**

**Chapter 6 - Part II**

"_**Nothing good ever came out of a whiskey bottle, Walter**_"….

"_**Time you started acting like a man instead of some kind of punk**_"…

My mom's voice. My dad's voice. Why was I hearing them?

As oblivion dissolved, reality came creeping in, bringing a little comprehension with it. I began to understand why I was dreaming of my parents and that day so long ago. That day when I was fifteen and drunker than a skunk. Henry and I 'found out' by my dad. Henry's dad coming to get him, my dad hauling me home, practically by the ear. He was a big man, like me. Lean, but tough as hell.

I'd been made to sit at the kitchen table while they gave me 'the lecture' and I remembered feeling so sick that I couldn't listen to what they were saying, although I'd tried my best to appear to be. All I'd been worried about was trying to keep myself from puking. I managed, until my dad set my punishment in the form of mucking out the horse stalls, to commence immediately upon the end of 'the lecture'. I'd staggered to the barn and tried my best, even though I could hardly stand up….but the dizziness and the smell of manure got the better of me and I ended up puking for what had felt like forever, feeling much worse than the shit I'd been trying to shovel.

As reality set in a little deeper, I became aware of lying on my stomach, my arms tucked up under the down pillow that cradled the side of my face. So, I was in bed. 'Feeling' crept up and I realized that I felt hungover. Head slightly pounding, mouth as dry as dust, eyelids too heavy to open and my body felt like I'd been run over by a herd of stampeding horses. My back and my arms in particular were pretty sore.

In the groggy recesses of my mind, I searched for an explanation as to why I should be feeling this way. The hangover, well, okay, I did over-indulge in the beer from time to time, but never to the point of feeling quite like this. The aching body? Getting the shit kicked out of me was at least a monthly occurrence, but this felt different. More localized, for lack of a better word. Like I'd been doing something I hadn't done for a long time, something strenuous and out of the ordinary for me.

I thought about it. Obviously, I'd been drinking and not just beer. Felt reminiscent of that long ago whiskey experiment, but not nearly as bad, which was a good thing. It felt more like an after-thought to the beer, if that made sense. Did any of this make sense? Come to think of it, how sure was I that I was in MY bed? I mean, hell, I could barely remember anything, so why should I be certain about anything? I decided to do the painful, manly thing and open my eyes…

Good God Almighty!

I was dreaming, right? But as soon as I'd asked myself that question, I felt Reality slam in to me like a ten-ton truck. I was looking at Vic, sitting in the chair beside MY bed, all of it softly illuminated by the small bedside lamp.

She was sitting there, wearing one of my button –down shirts, sleeves rolled up, and nothing else. Her hair was loose, clean and shiny looking, falling past her shoulders. She had one lean, bare leg crossed over the other, a mug in her hands and a slight smile on her face as she watched me with those expressive eyes of hers. What they were expressing right now seemed to be mild humour mixed with tenderness. Wasn't sure if I looked as bad as I felt or if she was just happy to see me.

"You finally awake, cowboy?" and the question was low and husky, as soft as she looked.

"What the - ?" and I cut myself off as I tried to roll over so I could sit up. Damn, I was one hurtin' man, in so many ways!

"Yeah, coffee first, Walt. Talk –ee later" and she got up and came to the bedside. This close to me, I could smell my shampoo on her, my soap, even MY scent on the shirt. She'd obviously showered in MY shower and I hadn't heard a thing. The bathroom was connected to the bedroom and it didn't take much sherlocking on my part to come to the conclusion that I'd been out cold.

Without taking my sore eyes off her, I managed to get myself propped up against the headboard, stupidly trying my best to keep the blankets over my lap. I suddenly KNEW she'd already seen my 'lap' in all its naked glory, but still…

She handed me the mug. Strong and black, the way I liked it. No cream or sugar, the way she took hers, so she must have been sitting there, waiting for me to wake up. She must've been sitting there watching me sleep. And just what had I done in my sleep? Play with my chest hair? She'd told me I did that, but when, exactly? I was beginning to think I'd done far less in that state than I had while awake previous to.

"Uh, thanks" was all I could think to say.

"You're welcome," she replied gently and then sat down on the edge of the bed next to me. She ran a hand down my bare chest, starting at my collar bone and ending up where the blankets covered me. Dangerously close in the moment, but I knew she'd been closer. I knew that she knew EVERY inch of me, just as I knew every sweet inch of her. The mug remained in my hands, forgotten, as I let my eyes wander over her, remembering…

"Not feeling so hot this morning?" she asked sounding maybe a little worried.

"That depends" were the first words to come out of my mouth.

"On what?" she laughed.

"On whether or not I'm remembering things right." And I took a sip of coffee, seeing in her eyes that what I remembered had in fact actually happened. Images of the two of us together waltzed through my mind.

"And?" she queried, that slightly tilted grin of hers telling me she was enjoying this.

"In relationship to what went on, I can say I'm feeling not too bad, considering" and I felt my own lips curve in to a smile. I could see that she wanted to kiss me, but I owed her some teasing. Oh yes, I recalled that little champagne incident, and while making her wait for a kiss seemed like hardly anything at all compared to that, it was the best I had at the moment.

I nonchalantly took another, longer sip of my coffee.

"One question" I told her. "Just what the hell time is it? I seem to have misplaced my watch" and I showed her my bare wrist while going back to sipping.

"I really don't know, Walt. It's still dark out, the moon's riding low…and honestly, who gives a fuck?"

She took the mug from my hands and plunked it down on the bedside table and then she was on me, over me, straddling me, sitting on my lap. Her hands slid up my chest, over my shoulders and came together behind my neck, her fingers toying with my hair. Her forehead was pressed to mine, her nose in line with mine, her lips just inches away from my own.

I slipped both my hands up under the borrowed shirt she was wearing, remembering how I'd ripped hers right off her body, the way she'd ripped mine open. I felt my way up from her hips, over the bumps of her ribs, along the underside of her breasts, closing my eyes when her lips touched mine and every single thing we'd done last night came back to me in glorious 3D HD, complete with stereo surround sound.

As a movie, on the surface, it was definitely pornographic, but below and deeper, it was so much more. The story of a man with a fire he kept deep inside, finding the only woman who could bring that fire out, take it, revel in it and give it back to him in such a way that he was glad he'd been born with it. The story of a man who tried so hard to keep it all inside that he'd resorted to using his mind to add humour to the situation, to soften it, temper it…

And I actually had to laugh out loud as I thought about THE FIGHT OF THE CENTURY, the image of my brain with stick legs and arms, waving pom-poms around, The Prick as the victor in the ring, The Brain taking one on the chin while The Prick started his happy dance. The Brain being kicked to the curb once the dance was over and the fire had been lit again. Wow, just how drunk had I been?

"Um, I don't think you're supposed to be laughing right now," Vic reminded me. I could feel her lips move against mine as she spoke.

"Oh, Vic, if you only knew the things that had gone on in my head last night, you'd laugh, too."

"I've got some thoughts of my own" she purred. "Feel like sharing?"

"I wouldn't even know where to start."

"How about where we left off" and she pressed her lips to mine again. I followed her lead, but then became self-conscious about my breath, the sticky state of my body and yeah, the smell of my sweat. I pushed her away, gently and reluctantly. If I hadn't thought about those things, chances were pretty good that I would've taken her again, right then and there and how on earth was that even possible? This fire was out of control! Yeah, she'd called me a pig and 'insatiable', but it hadn't been a complaint. Oh, no, there'd been no complaining at all. Only compliance of the most eager sort.

"I'm a mess" I told her by way of apology. She looked down at me, critically, and then laughed and told me that yeah, I was.

"Why don't you go shower," she suggested, getting off me. I missed her warmth right away. "I'll go make us something to eat, 'cause I don't know about you, but all that exercise has made me as hungry as a horse!"

As soon as she said the word 'horse' I was up and out of bed, regretting the sudden movement, but moving anyway. I grabbed a pair of jeans I'd discarded days ago and yanked them on while Vic looked at me as though I'd lost my mind.

"What the hell?"

"The horse! I forgot to feed The Horse last night!" I opened the closet and grabbed the first shirt I could find. I shrugged it on and clumsily did up the buttons. My head was pounding like one of Henry's drums, but I was too busy being mortified to pay it much attention. How could I have forgotten about The Horse? I guess it had been easy with my mind on other things, but still. Jesus, the poor guy hadn't been fed since before that trip to Bozeman!

I grabbed Vic and gave her a quick kiss, then headed out of the room, not as steady as I'd like to be.

"You're leaving me for a horse?" she called after me, playfully indignant. I noticed that the living room was a disaster and the kitchen wasn't much better. Luckily, I found my coat and boots, put them on but when I went to reach for my hat, it wasn't there. Right, it was still in the truck. I could get it on my way to the corral.

"If The Horse could feed himself, Vic, trust me, I'd still be in bed with you" I said apologetically, "or you'd be in the shower with me." She was right behind me now. My hand was on the doorknob.

"Well, apparently, wild horses CAN drag you away from me" but she was smiling. "Go feed your damn horse and I'll see if you have any damn food in this place so I can feed YOU."

"Thanks, Vic" and I left the cabin with a smile that damn near froze to my face.

It was bitterly cold out. A typical Wyoming January morning. I just hadn't been ready for it, at least not this quickly. New Year's Day. Still dark out, but as Vic had said, the full moon was riding low, almost touching the mountain tops, it's silver light making it seem even colder. My boot heels crunched in the snow and I could see my breath in white plumes. I buried my hands in my pockets and hunched my shoulders in an attempt to keep any exposed skin warm. Felt like I couldn't make it to the truck fast enough. I made a mental note to bring in more firewood once I was done with The Horse.

I opened the passenger side door and it protested in the cold. There was my hat and there were my gloves behind the seat. I put everything on, a chill running down my spine as the coldness met my body. I grabbed my rifle, too. Had to be careful out here in the dark, and maybe more especially now, while the moon was full. Wolves and other predators loved to run with the moon. By the time I made it to the corral, my gloves and hat didn't' feel quite like ice against me. Lovely thing, that body heat…and that made me think of Vic.

I opened the gate to another protest of frozen hinges and in his little 'barn' I could hear The Horse whicker and neigh. I entered, pulling the cord on the overhead light and there he was in his stall, pawing at the ground with his front hooves.

"Hey, I know, I'm sorry" I told him softly as I set my rifle aside. "I didn't mean to forget about you, buddy".

I opened his stall and he nudged up against me.

"Good morning" I told him, running one hand just under his chin, the other down between his eyes and over his nose. He was a beauty, as black as night, tall and strong. I was the lucky one when he'd decided to keep me. He nudged me again.

"I know, I know! Look, go run around and I'll get you your breakfast." I nuzzled him one more time and then slapped his rump. He took off through the barn door and I set about filling his troughs; one with food, the other with water. Even though the barn was heated, it seemed the water wasn't of a mind to flow all that well today, but I got enough to fill his trough. I'd have to look in to that later.

I fetched up a bale of hay and carried it outside, setting it down for his later consumption. Until it was clearly daylight, he'd be staying in the barn It wasn't just the wolves I was worried about; cougars would be on the prowl, too, especially with this moon. I went back in and grabbed my rifle, just in case.

I watched The Horse canter and trot around the corral, tail held high, forelegs kicking up playfully, stretching his long neck and bobbing his head every now and then. It's said that the outside of a horse Is good for the inside of a man, and that adage certainly was true. I'd have to take him out later for a ride; he'd been cooped up too long. I'd take Vic with me, too.

I sat down on the hay bale, watching The Horse and then I was watching the moon and replaying the night I'd just spent with Vic. The cold air seemed to straighten me out and then disappear as I thought back. The porno movie fascinated me but I wanted to go back further, to the beginning of it all. It was hard, though, to get past the naked image of Vic, how absolutely perfect and sexy she was, but I managed, only because I knew I'd see her like that again. And there was a very strong possibility that it would be soon. Yeah, I guess I was a pig! Couldn't help it, though; she turned me on and after last night, there was no turning me off.

I was thinking about my feelings for her while she slept against me in the truck on that forever ago ride back from Bozeman. Thinking that I loved her. That I had for quite some time. I know it had been my intention to tell her that I did, but EVERYTHING had gotten in the way…

Until that moment when I'd let it come out, that moment after so many wonderful moments. I'd finally said it, meaning it…and she hadn't said anything. She had smiled, but that was it and I'd forgotten about it once she'd climbed on top of me.

But sitting here, possibly freezing my ass off, I remembered. I tried not to place too much importance on her lack of verbal response. I mean, both of us had been so caught up in each other. Nothing else had mattered except that damn inferno between us, that all-consuming fire that engulfed us and here I sat, on a bitterly cold New Year's day, hungover, sore and yes, tired…but all I really felt was alive. So very, very alive, as though I'd just woken up to what I was, who I was and who I was meant to be with.

Vic was inside, making me breakfast, so why the hell was I sitting out here, thinking about everything? I whistled for The Horse and he came to me, prancing and rearing, nickering at me when he finally calmed down and I put my hand on him. He followed me in to the barn, back to his stall and his breakfast and I made my way back to the cabin for mine. I had an armload of wood and my rifle as I headed up the front steps.


End file.
